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Would you rate my poem?

If only the night had lasted

I close my eyes and think of that night
Your eyes are the stars I see
How gladly I would have traded my soul
To have stayed there for eternity

Your hair was soft as a summer??s breeze
Your smell as sweet as a kiss
I etched the moment in my mind
So I could always reminisce

As I traced the outline of your face
I fought to slow down time
But the hours I had were fleeting few
Those few I claim as mine

With every ounce of strength I fought
To slow the passing time
But every ounce was not enough
As clock bells began to chime

With the sum of all of my want and love
I waged a war I could not win
Powerless to hold onto a night
I could not will into being again

I could not hold onto the night
And soon your memory will fade
You??ll have no remembrance of my love for you
Or of the pledges that I made

You don??t remember the pledges I made
Forgotten in your frenzied state
But I will never forget the way you felt
As the night??s hour approached late

Today your dizzy head betrays you
With each day the details wane
But mine are honed as sharp as steel
The night??s memory keeping me sane

You smiled at me today
And today that will get me by
Perhaps today I could have called you mine
If only the night had lasted...

6 months ago
Looking for honest criticism. Can you guess as to why she can't remember?

Thanks!!!!

that's a really great poem, did u really write it? i rate it a 10+
it's sweet and romantic

i dunno why she can't remember though maybe she has a mental challenge??? maybe she was...drunk-naa probably not. i dunno!