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Question: Good start to a book!?
It was 2 'o' clock when the blue and red flashing lights came shining through my window!. I got up dazed and confused from my bed, and walked towards my parent's room!. Right as I reached for the handle someone started pounding on the front door!. I paused for only a second before a threw open my parent's bedroom door!. But as I ran over to their bed and saw that the covers showed no signs of use!.
I had seen this in movies all the time, and my character was the one who no one cared about!. They just wanted this little brat out of their way so that they could do their job!.
I began to cry, tears streaming down my face!. The pounding at the door increased as I ran to hide in my parent's closet!.
By now I was in hysterics as I tried to think of other possible reasons why my parents hadn't come home last night and why there were police at the door!. But all I could come up with was one scenario!. My parents were dead!. I knew that all too well, there wasn't a doubt in my mind!. But I wanted to be strong, and brave, for them!. I wouldn't let them down, not now, not ever!.
With my parents faces fresh in my mind I slowly made my way downstairs!. I didn't know if the police were still here because the pounding had stopped, but when I opened the door I saw the flashing lights and the pained face of the officer!. I knew what he was going to say, but it was still the hardest thing I had ever heard!.
“I'm sorry dear, your parents are dead!.”
That was all he said!. It broke me down!. I couldn't be brave anymore!. I just wanted my mom to say that it was all OK, and my dad to pick me up and twirl me around like he use to!.
The officer had obviously been expecting me to cry, and he wasn't at all ready for what I did!. He had knelt down to my level and I couldn't believe how uncaring he was being so I sung my arm forward and caught him right in the nose!. I was small, but I could take care of myself!. After connecting and hearing a satisfying crunch I bolted!. The officer caught up to me with no problem, turns out that sound was not his nose, it was my knuckle cracking when I hit his teeth!. He said that everything was going to be fine, in a tone that almost as if he was trying to reassuring himself!.
I sat in the back of the cruiser staring out the window hoping this was all just a bad dream!. I was praying that it was almost over and I would wake up in my bed nice and cozy!. But when we got to the emergency room and the doctor started messing with my hand I knew I wasn't dreaming!. The pain was real!. As soon as I realized that everything came rushing in!. Where was I going to go!?
What happened to my parents!?
Did anyone in this world even care about me at all!?
I soon got the answers to the first two!. I was sent to live in an orphanage and was told that my parents were killed in a car crash!. At first the answer to the third questioned seemed to be yes, but as time wore on it all became clear that I was just an annoying little brat that everyone wanted out of their way!.


please tell me what you think, and if you have any suggestions, this is the first chapterWww@QuestionHome@Com


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
I don't think it's bad!. I think it's obvious that you're new to writng!. That's okay!.

Your tenses are mixed!. You go from past tense to present!. There are also some redundancies!. You state things twice when it's unnecessary!.

You just keep writing every day just like you did here!. Maybe join a class!. You'll do great!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

its a very good start!. but only one thing: it wasnt very grasping!. you should just think of twists and turns in the story!. (but not too many)Www@QuestionHome@Com

very good!. nice organizationWww@QuestionHome@Com