Question Home

Position:Home>Books & Authors> What do you think of my story so far? ?


Question: What do you think of my story so far!? !?
As I stare out my window, sheets of rain fall from the sky!. I am fascinated by the shear volume of water!. ‘There are so many raindrops!.’ I focus in on one until it hits the ground, and then another!. ‘It’s similar to school!.!.!.there are so many students, and I’m only one!.’ I’d been sitting here for more than 10 minutes, just staring and comprehending!. I have a lot of opinions, ideas, and thoughts!. However, no one hears them!. As I battle through school each and every day, I’m constantly reminded of how I don’t fit in!. My name is chanted, calling to my attention that my name is odd!. The popular girls laugh along, snickering and whispering behind my back!. I have just turned fourteen, and I couldn’t be more miserable!. I try not to let it get to me!. I try to ignore it!. It just won’t go away!. Something inside of me just wants to let go, to show everyone who I am and be proud of myself!. To accomplish something worthwhile!. I don’t want to be friends with these people, for they’ve always been the root of my misery!. But for some reason, I want to show them that I’m not just some shy, quiet girl!.!.!.that I’m capable and important!. And another factor added onto my dismal existence is that I’m not thin!. I hate my body!. As I see the other girls, all with close fitting shirts and skinny jeans, I grow envious!. I want my life to change, to change drastically!. I live day by day, just pretending that nothing is wrong!. At the end of the day, however, I count through everything that’s wrong with me!. My name!. My body!. My teeth!. My hair!. My clothes!. Nothing is right!. I cry myself to sleep many nights, wishing only to be wanted!. Popular!. Outgoing!. But I know in the heart of hearts that it will never happen!. I have no motivation whatsoever-no one to cheer me on or be my friend!. Sometimes I think, ‘how would the people who had teased me so brutally feel if I were to die!? What if something horrible happened to me, because of them!? And then I realize how pathetic I am, and wallow in self pity!. I am such a baby!.Www@QuestionHome@Com


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
i love it! this is fantastic! it totaly sounds like something that i would read!. i esspecialy liked the way you described the rain!. i think that it is not too depressing, it shows alot of voice and emotion!. you should continue writing it because its brilliant!


nice job!Www@QuestionHome@Com

It's got some potential!. I think that if you changed the tense from present to past, it would make more sence, but only because I enjoy reading 'past tense' books!. I find the present tense ones confusing!. Www@QuestionHome@Com

It is amazing book! Just check spelling in some areas!. Great details included!.
That book I would obviously read!. It sounds like a new amazing book!
Tell me when you get more done! :)Www@QuestionHome@Com

WOW! That's really good! I love it, It's definitely a book I would read!Www@QuestionHome@Com