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Question: Which's better to write descriptively or using alot of verbs !?
I stood in front of our house!. A wooden, squared, bulky house, with a red bricked chimney !.The stench of dry ember indicated that it didn't witness any kind of smoke, even on winter's most pinching nights!.
The coldness that dwelled in my mother's and my heart was lurking inside since a very long time!. three years have passed since his death!. My father he died !.I can't help thinking of his aquiline face !.sturdy, broad chest, where he used to hug me!. And when he kissed me ,his brown,thick moustache tackled me tenderly on my plumb cheeks!.
Tears rolled the moment his voice echoed in my head
"take care , I love you jake"
is it good enough!?!?!?Www@QuestionHome@Com
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
No, it is most certainly not good enough!.
Get rid of all those nasty adjectives; I actually found myself yawning as I read this!. Was your goal to put readers to sleep!?
I mean, seriously!. This sentence is atrocious: "And when he kissed me, his brown, thick mustache tickled me tenderly on my plumb cheeks!."
As I said in your other question (where you fished for compliments), you are really laying it on thick, and it's awful!. We do not need to know every detail of his mustache, every detail of how it tickled you, and every detail of your cheeks!.
"And when he kissed me, his mustache tickled my cheeks!."
Short and to the point is the best way!. Don't use SO many adjectives; learn to use them like salt!. Salt is great in moderation, right!? But if you pour a whole container of it into your cake, your masterpiece is destroyed!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
definitely DESCRIPTION!.
it's the most imortant thing to include in a book, without it, your book would be a fail!. verbs need to be descriptive as well!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
they are kind of the same thing but it is better to write descriptively because u r doing that u r most likely to put in verbs!.
P!.S!. The description is well written!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
To be a successful writer, one must write, then re-write and re-write until the text is smooth and understandable!. One must also use correct English!.
Regards,
DanWww@QuestionHome@Com
the first bit is good, but the rest is covered in oatmeal words and linking verbs!. The terrible grammar of the second paragraph deeply distracted me!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
describing well and quite a bit, and using verbs, but not overloading on verbs, in my opinion would be bestWww@QuestionHome@Com