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Question: Please tell me some opinions of how you liked my story!?
“Pack your bags and slap on some sunscreen! You’re going on a cruise!”
I was abruptly shocked at the words coming out of my father’s mouth!.
“Oh my gosh! Are you serious!?”
“Yes, you deserved it this year with your fantastic grades!”
“Thanks Dad! You’re the best ever! But where are we going!?”
“On the eleventh of July, you, along with your brother and cousins are departing from Detroit to Miami where you will board your cruise ship,” my father answered!.
“Miami…here we come!” I said excitedly!.
The beautiful palm trees, the sun on my back, the crisp breeze, Miami was like heaven on earth!. There were beautiful parks with vibrant flowers surrounding the gardens!. It was so open and breathtaking!. I was awestruck with the beauty of Miami’s greenery!. We toured the city’s hot spots such as Miami South Beach and Miami’s Coral Castle!. Finally, it was time to board the ship!
If Miami was beautiful than the cruise ship was enthralling! As soon as we entered the ship in the evening, we were exposed to the vibrant lightings and grand size!. Everywhere we looked there were a variety of luxuries to experience!. From casinos to princess theatres of full scale Broadway shows, from spacious outdoor pools to a professional outdoor jogging track, twenty four hour bistros to relaxing days at the spa…all fit to a ship in the middle of the ocean! It was my dream come true!
The ships destinations were not only Miami!. The cruise ship sailed us to Grand Cayman Islands and the remarkable Jamaica! In Grand Cayman my favourite part was when we were at the beach and rode sea doo’s! The beach was mesmerizing with its pristine, turquoise water and white sandbar!. There were many coral rocks of different shapes and sizes strewn across the beach!. The sea doo ride was exhilarating! Water splashed in my face and the sensation was thrilling!
The excitement and thrill of Grand Cayman was long over when we stepped onto the striking land of Jamaica! If I thought the sea doo was dangerous, than the climb up Jamaica’s Dunn River Falls was deadly!.
Dunn’s River Falls is located in a tropical forest and consists of a number of waterfalls which flow over rock terraces down to the Caribbean Sea below!. We were able to climb the falls in a human chain led by skilled tour guides and we were fortunate enough to reach the top where we could enjoy unobstructed views of the surrounding areas!. Besides the fact of its scenic beauty, the falls were really steep and slippery and major injuries could occur either because of the water pushing you off or just by the slip of a foot!
Although, we were enjoying Jamaica, it was time for us to head back to the ship!. When we reached the port, the captain was standing outside on the dock and he said to us, “The ship has been delayed due to some certain circumstances so we have to stay in Jamaica for another day!. We will be departing tomorrow morning at 7:30!.”
We decided to explore Jamaica some more, while we had the opportunity!. The people of Jamaica have a laid-back personality and are always with a ready smile to help!. They threw us all a feast, with dancing, games, and about 30 barbeques spitting and sizzling in a synchronized manner!. We were able to engage in their culture, wonderful food, and nightlife on the beach!. It was absolutely amazing!. Alas, our trip had to come to an end, but it was definitely a worthwhile experience to undertake and I hope to go again soon!
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Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
its a good basis for a story but its too sequency!. throw in more dialouge through out and use less exclamation points!. Www@QuestionHome@Com