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Question: Is this a good way to describe feeling numb!?
I'm trying to relate the feeling of being numb and lifeless to silence because silence is made of nothing and so is feeling numb!. is this a good way to describe it!?
"“What is silence made of!? Surely not the wind that climbs the treetops with no defends!. Maybe the sound that politely defines the concept of a trend!. A frozen noise that indulges at night!. That takes control of your eyes and tries to fight!. That blinds your ears and rings inside, eventually blinding your mind!.” It was less sloppy and the lines were even on my paper!. I looked around and realized that complete silence surrounded me!. So what is silence really made of!? Nothing!. Just like what I was feeling!."Www@QuestionHome@Com


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
The writing is really pretty!. Though, I must admit, your second line takes some hard thought to decipher what you mean, and not in a good way really!. The rest is nice!.
I read this one thing about numbness!. (I paraphrase:) "The feeling you get when you run your fingers through the chain-link fence, the long, long fence!. Don't you ever wish that you would feel that all over!?"

Edit: Who are we talking about!? Me, or the answerer above me!? The first was to Dylan H, the second to me, and the third to Aly!? Okay!.!.!.
Response to second edit: I do get the second line, even without assistance, but I was trying to say that you should reword!. I guess I should be more clear and less prudent!.
People with above-average intelligence will try to decipher what they read, and ususally succeed; those with average intelligence try to figure things out, and succeed sometimes, and when they don't they cover it up (like one of the answerers above)!. People with below-average intelligence do not bother to try and decipher writing; if it confuses them, they give up!. That's what I was trying to say, but seeing as several people above me didn't get it, I didn't want to offend them or you, so I said what I said!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

It's a very poetic description, and I admit I like it!. However, I agree with Just Kelsey about the second sentence!. It could be worded in a different way!. I really like the fourth sentence; it's my favorite part, I think!.

Edit: No one is saying that the second line has no depth!. We're saying it could be worded better!. And I think that you assuming she just doesn't get it is condescending!. Remember that you asked for advice!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

I really like it!. Alot!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

wow that's something to think about!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Ehh, big words and I couldn't understand!. Lol! It's cool, though!. I like what I could understand!. It's a poem, right!? :)Www@QuestionHome@Com

look in a thesaurusWww@QuestionHome@Com