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Question: What do you think of this part of my novel!? Is it belivable!?
When young men and women come of age in the village, they typically marry someone close to their age!. However, "Jane" falls in love with a man who is much older than her (she's 19, he's in his late 50s)!. They're happy together and though some people make jokes and whisper about them, their relationship is mostly accepted and encouraged by the villagers!.

Jake's brother and sister-in-law, however, are very jealous and don't like Jane because they think a pretty young girl would only marry an old man for his property!.

When Jane is discovered to be pregnant before she marries Jack, the brother and sis really began to hate her and spread lies that she was already pregnant and just got with Jack to take care of her!.

From that point on, the family ties are severed!. When J&J's daughter is born, her aunt and uncle and their children don't accept or recognize her as part of their family!.

The cousin closest to the daughter in age is especially mean to her!. Www@QuestionHome@Com


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
What's the moral of the story!? Make sure that characters change in the story by the end or else it won't be as interesting!.

also maybe the pregnancy thing is pushing it!.

also if you really went into detail about how they met, it could be believable!. Maybe make Jane 22 instead!?Www@QuestionHome@Com

Okay you have called the male character Jake and Jack !.!.which is it!?
I think if the family disinherits the baby then they must reconnect with it later as she is blood!.
Jane is considered a gold digger by Jack's family but she is the only family the baby has so she must remain close to her!.
Something of a tragic nature will probably reunite them all and the family will come to accept Jane and her baby,
Www@QuestionHome@Com

This should work pretty well!. You confused me a little with "Jake" and "Jack", though!.
You didn't mention if the marriage actually took place!. This might make a difference to Jane's (and her daughter's) standing!. Or how or when Jack died!.

Yes, it's a believable situation, given the circumstances you've given!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

I rather like it!. It's pretty believable because it probably happened!. I know I kinda think the same thing about others in my community that really are just gold-diggers and looking for a free ride!. Keep it it, very good!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Jane should be a bit older, like in her twenties!.
She's still jailbait for god sakes!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Believable in what way!? It's your story so it's your job to make it believable!.

I, for one, have a hard time believing that someone's brother can 'disinherit' the brother's wife!. Doesn't your world have any laws!?

Edit:
The reason for them disliking her can be anything!. It can even be what you said; that they think she's a gold digger!.

You didn't specify if they were married or not, but most laws are that the wife inherits her husbands estate!. I don't know what your setting is but if it is modern day America, it's not up to the brother to 'disinherit' his sister-in-law!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

EDIT: Okay, then!. So Jack is the 50-year-old!?

LASWww@QuestionHome@Com