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Question: How is this start to my story about life since my mom's death!?
My phone vibrated from somewhere under my pillow!. Startled, I reached for it and squeezed the side buttons to stop the vibrating!. Pulling the phone out from under my head, I held it close to my face and read “Greg” on the screen!. Dad was calling!. I tossed the phone to the floor beside my bed and shifted my body back into a comfortable position!.
Not twenty seconds later I heard the ring of my brother’s phone!. His room was just outside mine, so I could easily hear every movement!.
“Hello!?” Miles whispered into his phone!.
I guessed my dad was b!.itching at Miles for me and him to get up!.
“Okay, hold on,” Miles said!. He got up from his bed and walked down the hallway into my parent’s room!.
I heard him knock on the bathroom door and call for Mom!. Not until then did I notice the sound of running water from the bathtub!. I knew I had been asleep much longer than it took to fill the tub!.
I felt paralyzed in my bed!.
All I could do was listen to that damn running water!.Www@QuestionHome@Com


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
Thanks for your answer to my poem!. That really meant alot comming from someone my age with a common goal!.

The beginning to your story is great!. I like how "real" it is!. Your telling it how it is not hiding behind a fake "I'm a good little writer" mentality haha (I guessed my dad was b!.itching at Miles for me and him to get up!.)
I promise I'll keep doing what I do if you do =)
And I'm sure we'll see eachother on book shelves!. Probably fighting neck to neck for best seller =)Www@QuestionHome@Com

hey we all have had bad stuff happen to us but you really know how to make a good story about what happened to you!. i think you should finish it!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

You forgot to add your Copyright protection!.

And!.!.!. I suggest you keep it as a private journal for now!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

omg this is sooo good can u please finish it i need to hear more!Www@QuestionHome@Com