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Question: Is this opening good for the book i am wrighting!.!?
Into the…!.


My name is Trevor and I am 15, I have an 11 year old brother named Joey and a 2 month old sister named Tina!. I can still remember the day my life changed!. I now live alone in an old abandon shed in a forest with my siblings!. Life is hard when you lose you Parents!.
Everyday is trying to survive……!.


Chapter 1: Why live!?

“Hey Joey!” Trevor called out!. “Take care of your sister while I go see if I can get some food down the village for dinner tonight!.” Joey ignored and continued playing with his almost torn stuffed bear!. “Hey! Are you evening listening to me!?” Joel said!. “Yeah yeah…!. I heard you the first time!.” Joey snapped!. “Take care of sister till you come back, see I heard!.” Trevor sighed and went to go grab his worn out shoes from the old dusty cabinet!. “Make sure you don’t leave her alone in the house and go throwing stones at animals in the forest again!.” Trevor said goodbye to Joey and Tina and walking out the wooden door!. Joel reached the small village called Tamvill!. Once there Trevor saw am old women that dropped her groceries!. “Are you ok!?” asked Trevor!? “Why yes dear!. Thanks for your concern, but aren’t you one of those pesky kids from that Pock Gang!.” Said the lady nervously!. Trevor started picking up the lady’s groceries and putting them in the brown paper bag!. “No, I am not!. Who is the Pock Gang!?” asked Trevor!. “You never heard of the Pock Gang!? Said the lady in much surprisement!. “They are the most ruthless band of teenagers who go around beating people for the fun of it!. Why yesterday they almost killed a 14 teen year old girl with long black hair with a cute butterfly Hair pin who would have got killed if it wasn’t for a small boy with a worn out teddy in his hand!. He took her to the east side of town and took care of her till her bruises were okay!. Oh my how time flies!” The lady said while looking at her watch!. “Here have these” The lady handed a batch of bananas, gallon of milk and a loaf of bread to Trevor!. “Thanks, I am very grateful!.” Trevor said while taking the stuff!. “Take care and try not to get in trouble with those Pock Gang members!.” The old lady said waving to Trevor!. “Well I came what I came here for and looks like I have some free time!.” Trevor said in his head!. He walked to the small river on the west side of the village!. He saw a girl about his age standing dangerously on the edge of the bridge!. “Hey what the hell are you doing!?” Trevor yelled out to the girl!. “There are ones that get up and just end up falling again!.” Said the girl crying!. Trevor notice the pin she had on her head was a butterfly!. “What do you mean!? I don’t understand! Please get down from there!.” Said Trevor!. “Shut up! You don’t know what I have been threw! She shouted!. She started to fall!. Trevor ran as fast as he could and grabbed her hand!. “Let go! I have no choice but to do this! If you have been threw what I have you would do the same!.” She pleaded!. “Shut up! You’re not going to die while I still live!.” said Trevor with watery eyes!. “Well I guess we will just have to fix that!.” Said a mysterious voice!. Trevor pulled the girl up as hard as he could!. “It’s the guys from before!.” Trevor looked and saw three guys, one with think long hair with a Mohawk and a tooth pick in his mouth!. The second one was a short hair but very tall!. The last one was very short but looked built and had torn raged short!. “The name is Ryan, Pock Gang member!. I see out little trouble maker has found a new partner!. Should we kill him!? Ryan said in a cocky voice!. “Yeah! Let’s kill the boy and have fun with the girl!.” The tall boy said!. The girl just took off her shoes and threw them straight at Ryan’s face!. “You little slut! You’re going to pay for that!” Ryan said trying to stop his nose from bleeding!. Ryan pulled a gun out from his pocket!. “What now!? You suddenly froze! You scared!? I bet you are!” said Ryan slowing coming to the girl and Trevor!. Ryan heard to splashes behind him!. He turned around and saw a boy with curly black hair and Brown eyes!. He noticed that his two Gang member were gone!. “Where the hell are they!? What did you do with them!?” Ryan demanded!. “You more stupid than you look!. Here let me explain the even you little pea sized brain can understand!. I T-h-r-e-w T-h-e-m O-f-f!. You get it now!?” “You’re going to die for that!” said Ryan!. He pointed the gun and the curly haired boy!. Trevor ran up and grabbed Ryan’s hand!. He got the gun and Ryan fell back!. Trevor pointed the gun at Ryan!. “Hey no need to get hasty!. I was just playing around!.” Ryan said!. Ryan got up and started walking back slowly!. The curly haired boy ran at Ryan and pushed him off the bridge!. “Hey, say hi to my father for me when you reach hell!” Shouted the curly haired boy!. “You killed him…!.!. You killed them all! Why!?” said Trevor fumbling the gun!. “What are you, still a little boy who need his blanky!? It was either us or them!. You would have ended it up shooting him anyway!.” Said the curly haired boy!. “Who are you!?" Said the girl whipping off her tears!. “My name is Mezzo!.” Said the curly haired boy!.Www@QuestionHome@Com


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
fantastic!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i AM A WRITER AND WROTE A BOOK WHEN i WAS 12!.!.!.!.!.!.YOU GOT TALENT!!! kEEP IT UP AND SHOW THE PEOPLE WHO CRITICIZE YOU!!!Www@QuestionHome@Com

If you want to be an author, learn to spell!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

I can't get past the spelling, grammar, sentence structure, punctuation, and paragraph errors!.

These things don't need to be perfect (that's what editors are for), but it needs to be presentable!. It is not even close!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Punctuation isn't very good, there's uncalled for language and I think grammar should be more advanced!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

threw= throw something!. through= what ive been through!.

It's a good idea for a book!. I would read it!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

punctuation is terrible, and you cannot spell "writing"!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

your story is awsome wicked awsome but you need some help on punctuation !.hop this helps: ) (+[__]::)Www@QuestionHome@Com