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Question: Anything you would change in this poem!?
A Turtle's Last Words


Soft black eyes
look at the world
as much has changed
since younger days

Sitting on a sunlit rock
I wonder!.!.!.
what must it be thinking!?

Slowly, it turns its head to stare at me
for what had seemed my lifetime
but not his

Oh, what a peaceful nature
savouring life at the moment
living at a slower stride
It ponders, time passes
ever so slowly, does it bide
in the afternoon sun

The old creature
breaks the silence!.!.!.

"This old and tired soul
seeks no more to see
nor to live,
nor to nap in nature's warmth
yet seeks only
eternal sleep
so as not to worry
of this aging world!."

Slowly
or maybe time does play a trick on my mind
the turtle closes its eyes
as old as time itself
unto the sun- bathed world of nature
and upon his rock
he falls asleep

Nature cradles the turtle in her arms -
his eyes that did not wake again!.
--------------------------------------!.!.!.

Anything you would change!?
PLEASE
I need some reliable criticism!.Www@QuestionHome@Com


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
I think a poem about a turtle is a novel idea, and your experience identifying with it is truly a poetic license that you bring to fruit!. It's a neat, concise portrait!.
Years ago, after having moved to Florida, we went to a Chinese Restaurant in a downpour that was like the end of the world!. We were the only patron, and when we were finished and ready to go, the cook waved at us to come out back through the kitchen!. He just waved, didn't have English!. We obliged and through the screen door, we saw a large, oh-12 or 15 inch live turtle sitting in a pot hole in the pavement!. We had a laugh!.!.!.were sure they were just playing with dinner!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

This is really good! I would just check and see if you are using enough punctuation but other than that I wouldn't change anything!. It's really good! I love it!Www@QuestionHome@Com