Question Home

Position:Home>Poetry> Would you care to comment on this poem, and do you think winter has come early?


Question: Would you care to comment on this poem, and do you think winter has come early!?

Early Winter
by C!.S!. Scotkin

Great North Wind with cheeks distended
chastened the sky for being blue!.
Banished the clouds, gone and ended,
bleached Heaven’s vault a paler hue!.

His frigid breath seeped in my bones
caused goose flesh on my arms to rise
His wailing rush, his eerie moans,
announced the fair Autumn’s demise!.

Old Sol, his comfort withheld , too
His warmth was thin for all his light
He coolly floated all the day
Till icy shards reclaimed the night!.


11!.19!.08
CSS








Www@QuestionHome@Com


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
I think that the poem in beautifully written!. You actually made me cold reading it! You use language to your advantage and have a nice flow!.

One thing is that in the last verse you change the set up, with only the second and last lines rhyming!. This still seems to sound good and make sense, but if you were to enter a competition or something you would probably need to change this!.

Well done and keep on writing!.

xoxoxo

EDIT: Oh, and where I live (Australia) we are actually coming into Summer, not Winter!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

a fine bit of verse

Yes, I do belive winter has snuck in on us,,, when I headed out from my home on Florida's west coast a few months ago to go to the Durham area of NC for this project, little did I realize I was headed into an early deep freeze!. Last night may have been a preview of things to come with wind chills near 15!.

this too shall pass, I hope, and at least I do have the option of taking my time off back home with the warmth of dear friends to chase the chillsWww@QuestionHome@Com

Fantastic Cyn!! To answer your question: Yes, that S!.O!.B!. snuck in without warning! Well, I shouldn't say that, this IS Wisconsin after all, but geeez, we're going to have wind-chill temps hovering around zero tomorrow, and we got slapped with black ice on Monday!. I myself am hanging out in the kitchen baking cookies!.!.!.

*I love the first line!. Reminds me of the cartoon of the "wind with a face" and his cheeks all puffed up, mouth in an "O" just ready to balst us! What show was that!? I can't remember!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

An extremely well painted picture"!.!.!.cheeks distended" reminded me of the old sailing maps!. Your are my dear girl a very good artist, skilled in words as well as form!. One cannot but be part of this work, it draws you into itself!. It is timely as we in Australia are just coming into our summer!.

RobertWww@QuestionHome@Com

Cold and bones do not go together well!. Have already added that extra blanket to my bed - and the wearing of thermals to change my skin color from blue to toasty red ?

http://www!.mscottart!.com/BG/Wind,%20Clou!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

You have done a fine,fine piece of writing Sharp & vivid,Till icy shards reclaimed the night,,,,
Ohhh yeah!. Ole man winter has stuck his frigid bony body onto us a wee bit early I'm used to wearing shorts until after Thanksgiving,,,,,Not this year Www@QuestionHome@Com

Oh my yes!. I'm smiling because I just posted a poem on how quickly winter arrived on my doorstep!. Your poem is vivid and beautifully expressed!. I shiver beneath "His frigid breath!.!.!.", great line!. Www@QuestionHome@Com

Not too early, but is forecast to be colder than normal for lack of sunspot activity!.

Let's hope our winter is as enjoyable as your poem!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

I hear you loud and clear!.I feel it,Loved this poem, even though I hate winter and am in the north!.You nailed it!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

I like the personification of natural forces in this poem--and it rhymes, too!Www@QuestionHome@Com

Winter here thankfully is holding off and have had some fairly nice days!.
Very nice picture you painted, however!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Loved the poem!. It`s freezing here tonight!. In the 20`s!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Well in central Texas winter is still scared to show it face!.
The poem was very good!. Www@QuestionHome@Com

NiceWww@QuestionHome@Com