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Question: I just posted this poem in a Yahoo ans!. question!. Can I get your opinions please!?
Never in my life,
Never in my reality
Did such beauty exist!.
You're in my daily dreams!.
You're in my nightly dreams!.
Never were you invited,
Yet I never asked you to leave!.
As reality leaves me,
As so often does,
You remain faithful as I too!.
You are too good to be true!.
You can't be in my reality!
You are to good to be true!.
Your existance is unreal!
Hauntingly lovely you are,
Too lovely for me
To be worthy of you;
And faithful you remain!.
You must be my imagination,
For you are too good for me
To be deserving of you!.
And with love eternal you stay!.
I would trade my sanity for you!.
I would give my soul to you
And be your loving servant!.
I'm so in love with you
Because faithful you remain!.
Together always we shall be!.
And only to those with sane eyes
Do I remain aloneWww@QuestionHome@Com


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
I liked it!. It kept me reading to the end, and it's theme rings true of all encompassing love!. Although modern poems of today and their readers, are more chaste, using ununderstandable metaphors and harsh surrealism!. I find that simplicity of expression can be refreshing and just as deep and profound!. There are a few repititions of phrases, such as," you are too good to be true", and of remaining faithful!. Maybe edit those phrases into another description of devotion, and reasons in you that cause her to remain though, you can't believe them real!. also being "too good" in defferent phrasing or describing the ways she is so!. But the flow is good I like the transition of meaning ,in how you would trade your sanity , and only to those with sane eyes ,Do I remain alone!. Very good expression of the solitude of loving!. You have promise, you are definitely a fellow romantic!. Very reminiscent of my earlier pieces, though mine read as though they were from an earlier century of noblemen!. Always keep it real ,and don't let flowery prose overtake the emotion the muse dictates!. Just watch out for the repetitive prose, and stay fresh, and new with the theme, along it's thread!. Don't use too many ornaments of the same color in the decorating of your prose!. Less is sometimes more, and more is sometimes less!. Enhance the emotion, don't smother it with praise!. Give it it's own life, not just description!. Let it tell a story or novel in a heartbeat or breath!. Leave the reader, feeling and wanting!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Thats really cool!. Very deep and thoughtful!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

It's so-soWww@QuestionHome@Com

good but the lines are really shortWww@QuestionHome@Com