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Question: Your opinion on this is!?
Bored :) tell me what you think, still don't know if I want it to be a song/poem!.


Honest Lies
by me

The truth, everyone wants to know it,
but so little can actually handle it,
you like to make a show of it
but knowing it all isn't always right
your power to speak doesn't give out light
When you speak the world falls on me
crushing pressure I can't stand up
I only wish you would just grow up

Honestly your honesty is what is really hurting me,
everyday your words hit me full on like a hurricane
with no eye to sit in calm the storm,I might blow up
no use for it now, hurry darling grow up

Like a needle in my vain,your words puncture me with pain
sucking happy,sucking life,your words cut me like a knife!.
If being blunt made you strong then you are just so so wrong
because I am not one to sit and take
the kind of abuse you like to make

You play life like a game, doing only what you please!.
curling your evil tongue the game is getting fun,
until you realize your honesty is fire
but truly you're a liar a coward, a thief,
stealing confidence, leaving grief
stripping once smiling faces of any happy traces!.
but darling you wont succeed
at least not with me

Honestly your honesty is what is really hurting me,
everyday your words hit me full on like a hurricane
with no eye to sit in calm the storm,I might blow up
no use for it now, hurry darling grow up

Because honestly your honesty is not all its made up to be
the truth hurts but soon I realized the anger in your eyes
the hatred in your words coming out like dirty turds
all lies all lies made up by your evil eyes
quick to judge slow to react
you don't see I've made a pact
hurry darling just grow up
so you can survive this blow up!.Www@QuestionHome@Com


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
I like it!. There are some things about the rhyme and repetition that I think would work well for a song!. Most great songs have great poetry, but not all great works of poetry work well as songs!.

Just a thought!. How about using "few" instead of "little"!. It's more correct, but more importantly, more clear what you mean!.

I also liked the theme of the work!. It's clear you have experience with "nasty" honesty!. So few people notice the difference until it's too late, that is, until they're lying on the floor whimpering!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

You are Traffic!!! And I would most definitely say this is a song and a damn good one, Please post more of your work it was such a pleasure reading through it!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

This is!.!.!.the best poem i have ever read!.Why don't you make a book!?I am sure it will be a bestseller!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

WOW!!!!!!! that was AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 omg write more!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and im guessing its about someone you loved who abuses you or something and now you hate him!.!.!. am i right!?Www@QuestionHome@Com

It aint sweet!.Www@QuestionHome@Com