A Sonnet of Love . Rip it......?

Question: A Sonnet of Love !. Rip it!.!.!.!.!.!.!?

………… The Farm …………!.

On his rock, above the rapid whirls
A boy cursed “dang” the snag that pulled
Him down to laughing rainbow’s fooled
The baits and sniggers back-splashed hurls

Long gone his crawlers, he slashed that line
Kicked air at mighty’s mouth to choke
Slumped low in front bill pinched to soak
Shamed tears that stung luck worse this time

Then on the white road, past their turn
His father switched to a boy’s song,
Twisted him a beer, screw wrong
And drove to a place as a kid he learned

“Mom look, mom look I caught this fish” !
A dad made true his young son's wish!.
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Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

Herein lies the rub, the crux!.!.!.the dry rub!.!.!.
Is it a good sonnet, a good poem or both!?
I believe it is both, but I'm not a sonnetarian!.

EDIT: Cynthia is right!. I don't count beats when the flow is OK!. I think the iambitons will bash it!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

You mean to say those lovely fish my Dad brought home WEREN'T from the river!? I'm shocked and traumatised!.

(Didn't actually understand most of this!.!.!.!.but got the gist) Nice rhyming there, feller!.

Actually my Dad's fish weren't lovely!.!.!.!.they were huge eels from the River Severn (or was that the Gloucester to Sharpness canal!?)which frightened me to death when he cut their heads off and they still chased me!Www@QuestionHome@Com

To call this a sonnet is incorrect!. To call this a very nice free verse poem would be correct!. I get the feeling that the title was somewhat tongue in cheek, anyhow! Your meter and feet are erractic as well as end rhyme!. This is how it sounded to me as I read!.

!.!./!./!./!./
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!./!./!.//!./
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/!.!.///!./
//!.///!./

!./!.///!./
!./!./!.!.//
/!./!.///
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//////!./
!./!./!.///
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After recovering from the shock of seeing the "L" word in your question, I enjoyed this very much! Good ol' dad!
My husband grew up across the road from a trout pond!. He says they used to sneak in there all the time!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

I am a great fan of the Sonnet form! You have an unusual syllable count and perhaps one of the other poets who know far more than I will explain this!. I love the message about a loving father!. It's grand!Www@QuestionHome@Com

This is good!. I like it much!. You made me remember my dad and I cat fishing!. Kudos on this write!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Nice one Matteo!.!.!.finally something I can comprehend!. Fishing!!!Www@QuestionHome@Com

I went the whole way with you and never tripped once!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

You mean "The Funny Farm"!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Hook line & sinker, there is no fooling Mom :)Www@QuestionHome@Com

I love this one!
Takes me back to fishing with my Granddaddy when I was little!Www@QuestionHome@Com

Fishy fishy in the brook!.!.!.
you in trouble now

"fishing is the one waste of time, that God does not charge you for"Www@QuestionHome@Com

Bravo I like it!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

That's a lovely piece of writingWww@QuestionHome@Com

Friend, I would not risk diminishing this memory
by saying one word, other than offering my thanks!.

maWww@QuestionHome@Com

I love it!.!.!.!.!.xWww@QuestionHome@Com

I didn't get it!.!.!.!. you know what that means!!.!. it's great!Www@QuestionHome@Com