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Position:Home>Poetry> Poem ,i hope you like ,please be gentel i m not a native speaker and i write whaQuestion: Poem ,i hope you like ,please be gentel i m not a native speaker and i write what is in my heart!? She rocks back and forth The doll is bleeding in her hand She cries silently to keep the doll Sleeping She wish she could sleep Though The sun is gone And as it came again The doll is still sleeping And she keeps rocking back and forth The song of death sneaks into her lips The hand of darkness slapped her hard The fingers are shown in her veins Stop she screams stop, it hurts so much I laugh in front of them yes I cook and dance and pretend But it hurts badly The doll gets and walks away While she rocks back and forth Tears steamed with fire of heart And no one could seem to notice My heart ,my heart is burning I smell fire My ribs are the cage Please help me ,she drinks water But what could stop the fire of loss The hurt and pain The ignorance idiots that surround her She is tired of faked sympathy She wants to be crushed into his arms She knows she could forget every bad moment With him But its over, and she will pack and goes with the other Because simply Life isn’t what we want, its never like that She puts some lipstick and force a smile on her face And get out showing them how happy she is Www@QuestionHome@Com Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: Very, very good!! I write poetry myself!.!.!.this has a very powerful message!. Very intriguing! My favorite line: "My ribs are the cage" Keep writing! English is not my first language either!.!.!.!.!.!.!.it's portuguese!.!.so, never give up! Read a lot!.!.!.it helps! =)Www@QuestionHome@Com wow, i feel like you've really experienced what you're writing about!. very powerful!. and writing what is in your heart is the best thing to do!. if you don't feel it, it isn't real!.Www@QuestionHome@Com Your poem is very sad but I like it, you have a lot of talent!. I hope this is not how you feel!. Thank you for sharing!.Www@QuestionHome@Com i loved this!.!.!.well done!.!.!. it's sad and powerful and absolutely excellent thank you for sharing Www@QuestionHome@Com I absolutely love this! It has so much meaning!. Honestly, it is one of the best poems I've ever read!. You did such an amazing job! =]Www@QuestionHome@Com |