Position:Home>Poetry> My Poem...it touching or no?
Question: My Poem!.!.!.it touching or no!?
hey ppl i am 15!.!.!.i wrote a poem about my dad being away for a while and i really miss him!.!.!.do you think its touching!?
the day you left out the door
I knew it would kill me even more
I'd be scared to live my life without you
just because you always made my life less blue
my best friend, my love, my dad, off and and so so far away from me
oh how ca i get through these days and be!?
I feel closed and alone,
no one to run to and smell that expensive cologne!.
I miss you ,don't you see!?
I wish you'd hurry back to me!.
You're the only one that cares about how i feel
and makes sure that i nt become a third wheel!.
I try to go along and live life while you're away,
but it's no where near okay!.
Everywhere I look, I feel like I see your face
but the sad thing is, its not you!.
Don't you see how much I need you!?
Going around with these mixed feelings
that no one understands why i stare at the ceiling!.
They think I have anger issues, but my only problem is!.!.!.
I AM MISSING YOU!.
Www@QuestionHome@Com
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
wow, there is deff!. emotion in that!. its really good but i feel if you focus more on how you are affected than rhyming it will be more powerful!. Hope your dad comes back soon!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Wow!.!.
That took me back to a horrid argument my mom and dad had and him leaving!. I thought he was not going to come home!.!. Man I missed him
I as about 13!. He did come back and I went away, but our connection is here still today!.!.
Good for you for expressing it so nicely!Www@QuestionHome@Com
well it is a good poem, my only problem is when i read it if you take out the word "dad" it feels almost like from a females point of view about her husband!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Yes it is very touching especially me my dad had just left the week and he might be coming back but he might be divorcing my mom!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Your a very good writer of poetry!. Hope you see your dad again soon!.
Send him your poem, he will love it!. Www@QuestionHome@Com
ahhhhhhh very nice yes its touchingWww@QuestionHome@Com