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Question: Tomorrow may not come!?
tomorrow may not come

i haven't had time to tell you
that you mean so much to me
and i know you love me too
i just hope that you can see

you and i believe in the good lord
unlike some of our friends
and no you and me is like a broken sword
our friendship will last even though it bends

go on leave me and off with them
even though they can not see
the love and faith in the end
and you and i will still be

i wrote that with all the sympathy in my heart for my friend and i sent it to her!Www@QuestionHome@Com


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
A very beautiful poem if your poetry has any reflection on you as a person than your friend is very lucky instead to know someone like you, keep writing them and i think shell love itWww@QuestionHome@Com

This isn't bad for an early draft, but it needs a little work!. I believe that you intend this to be a serious poem, but your rhythm and your rhyme scheme speak of something more light-hearted, kind of sing-songy, like a greeting card!. There are spots where the rhythm is a little clunky; line 5 is an example!. Please, watch your grammar (Line 7 hit me like fingernails on a chalkboard!.!.!.LOL) And you ought to lose the lower case "i" as a pronoun; that doesn't work anymore!. Put it aside for a while and come back to it; I think you have it in you to make this much better!. Www@QuestionHome@Com

You should be a country music song writer!Www@QuestionHome@Com

u may like to reconsider tomorrow and the tomorrows thereafter will come 4 another billions of years BUT
ALAS

you i we or he or she may not be there when that tomorrow does as will comeWww@QuestionHome@Com

You are a true Poet!. Bravo, I will be watching out for any publications, Maybe!? Write more like this fine example here, and you will touch more people with your exquisite gift!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Excellent!.!.!.!.I like it!.!.!.!.Now compose another poem!.!.!.!.!.Tomorrow is certain to dawn!.!.!.!.!.as bright as today or even more!.!.!.!.yesterday was not bad and so is going to be tomorrow!.!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Sweet, she should like it!Www@QuestionHome@Com

Nice poem!.!.!. lovely good job!Www@QuestionHome@Com