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Position:Home>Poetry> Goodnight verse.. does it please?Question: Goodnight verse!.!. does it please!? Weep no more
My pixie child Dry your eyes Let’s see a smile Lye you down In feather bed Close your eyes Rest your head Moonlight flows Through window Wind gently rustles Leaves on willow Go to sleep on Feather pillow Suppressing yawns Soundly slumber Morning dawns Another number Dream now Blissfully Www@QuestionHome@Com Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: You need to change the ending, if you are singing to a child you don't want it to end so abruptly you want it to soothe them into sleep!. But it is very pleasing and gentle :] good jobWww@QuestionHome@Com Lye is not the word you want!. Lie would be preferable to 1-a strong, alkaline solution obtained by leaching wood ashes 2-any strongly alkaline substance, usually sodium or potassium hydroxide, used in cleaning, making soap, etc!. 3-any substance obtained by leaching I think you are trying to create an Olde English type of poem, which is why you have used lye!. Don't!. Use a dictionary first!. I recommend that you do not capitalize every line; poetry has come a long way from the time that the only way peasants knew it was poetry is that each line was capitalized!. You have used very few conjunctions: why!? Is it to keep the creation of an olde type poem!? Conjunctions are small and they work well to keep a poem flowing!. The poem has great potential!. I just had to write one that had been plaguing me for two days; it was wrenching my gut and had to escape before another ulcer did!. Keep writing!. Check the dictionary; there are a lot of on-line dictionaries so you don't even have to leave your desk!.t Www@QuestionHome@Com Are you by any chance related to the JohnBoy in the entry above yours!? If you are not about thirteen and this is not like, your second try at poetry, it is terrible!. Every line starts capitalized, but then is left in grammatical limbo!. This is standard Greeting Card fluff!. Sorry!.Www@QuestionHome@Com I sung it like this: thinking in greensleeves until Leaves on willow Leaves on willow, starts beating faster until Dream now Blistfully, Spoken softly as slumber over takes add a kiss to the forehead nighty nightWww@QuestionHome@Com It very much pleases! I found that poem very soothing and comforting!. It would make a beautiful lullaby!. You just get better and better!.Www@QuestionHome@Com Very much, its every bit as beautiful as the last!. I really enjoy your work Www@QuestionHome@Com WOW! That's good! Www@QuestionHome@Com completely pleasing to my mind Www@QuestionHome@Com awwww, that was nice!. It do please!.Www@QuestionHome@Com Yes, it pleases!.!.!.now if I just had a little one in my arms to sing this lullaby to!.!.!.THAT does not please!Www@QuestionHome@Com |