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Question: I have a poem!.!.!.and what inspires u to write!?
I hope you can see!.!.!.
That the trickle from your eyes
Is the reason why…
I condone you!.
Those tears of yours rupture my heart!.
Those tears of yours weaken me!.
Those tears of yours…they take control of me!.
I forgive you,
I tell you many a times!.
I blindly let you live again,
As I believe that my faith in God is never a lie!.
I look at you;
!.!.pain,
…regret,
…!.sorrow, written in my eyes!.
Letting you take control again,
…control over my deteriorating life!.
You take your breathe,
You grow once again!.
You look at me like you’ve already won,
You take your step
You grow once again!.
I look at you, knowing that you have won!.
Those tears of yours have saved you!.
You show weakness, but it’s actually your strength!.
Those tears of yours made you!.
But continue to break me at every length!.
Those tears of yours…I see
…Those tears of yours…set you free
……Those tears of yours…!.excessively!.!.!.fracture me
Any suggestions/comments!?!.!.!.!.I'm not so sure about the ending!.
And what inspires u!?
=)Www@QuestionHome@Com
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
Well done, In my opinion it is a lovely poem reflecting your true feelings!. I only could have a few words to say about anything to change in the poem if you want to improve it however like they say an original is an original!. Some of the ideas don't come together in the poem and when using the word "God" be careful as some may be atheist!. The ending is a tad bit over-done just change the last line it is:
Those tears of yours!.!.!.!. excessively!.!.!. fracture me
maybe something like:
Your tears!.!.!.!. filled with angst!.!.!. disrupt my harmony
But once again, its an excellent poem and if you feel good writing a poem remember its a way to let out your true feelings and no one on yahoo answers can tell you what is good and what is not!. If you are happy with it I'm happy as well and so will other people be!.
&& what inspires me do you ask!?
Our five senses usually give me the "push" to find and discover my sixth sense (writing poetry)
I could be looking out my window and see something to make me hear something and write something!.!.!. it is like a chain reaction!.
Thank you =)Www@QuestionHome@Com
i like it!.
except for the part of god!.!.im not much of a believer!.
other wise i deffinaly love it!
dejamarie!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
That is a beautiful peom masallah Www@QuestionHome@Com
Very Good Poem!! I'm inspired to write by whatever mood I'm in!.Www@QuestionHome@Com