Hmmm... what are your opinions on this piece?

Position:Home>Poetry> Hmmm... what are your opinions on this piece?

Question:

Where does the infallible source of knowledge reside!?
Why does it never seek but hide!?

I search many long and dreary nights
Peering for a clue within the abode of unknown
But I shudder for I know that I am prone
To wander the eternal path of a starry universe

No embraces to sanction my heartfelt need
For purity and whiteness beyond which life can feed

Indeed to wander
Through a darkened forest
Beneath a moon lit glade
Treading where time shall not
Will not fade

I do not request help
Nor do I try to fight off the inevitable

Feelings will always overwhelm
Always within this time space realm !.!.!.
Www@QuestionHome@Com

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

I'm afraid this doesn't hang together at all for me!. The images, whilst occasionally good are mostly confused!. It feels as if you have been trying to write in a 'fancy poetry' style to impress rather than concentrating on the poem and it's message/direction/story!.

The line - 'Peering for a clue within the abode of unknown' actually makes no sense when read closely, despite sounding quite esoteric!.

The last two lines also make no real sense together!. Sorry!.

Concentrate on the content of a poem first and then polish up the delivery or it all becomes smoke in the wind!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

I like the amount of description you used!. I suggest you add more sensory details and figurative language!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

'For purity and whiteness beyond which life can feed'
!?Www@QuestionHome@Com

Dont take this the wrong way but its absolute trash!. Www@QuestionHome@Com

I like it!Www@QuestionHome@Com