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Question: How to manage my verse!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!?
I've been a writer of missives and poetic verse since last Monday at approximately 1400 hours!.

I would now like to print, scan and copyright my stuff - and get published somewhere in Arkansas, say perhaps The Eureka Springs Lovely County Citizen!.

I feel it's best to hand-deliver my manuscripts, but I'm medium height and I only wear cargo shorts!.

What to do !?

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Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
Oh this is easy!.
You need to buy,beg,borrow,or steal, a little red wagon!.
Rent for the day, offer to babysit, or if you have your own, two toddlers!.
Feed them some ice cream or gooey candy!.
Someone mentioned Italy, hint: If that's where you live, wait to do all this after you arrive in Arkansas!.(I hear security is tight at airports)
Now, with your arsenal, walk to the newspaper office, hum or sing as you enter the door!.
See the woman behind the counter!?, She is your friend, the mother of the publisher, hopefully the toddlers are smiling and trying to lick the ice cream off their hands!. The mother is also the photographer this is the perfect photo op, ham it up!.
Now, I hope you brought a disc and the hardcopy because this is where it gets tricky!.
The mother is also the librarian, she needs to see the hardcopy (please don't call it that when speaking to her) ,,first, this new computer program has her bewildered and second, she is constantly looking for a responsible teenager to categorize and input every book ever written into the hard drive!. Don't get her started on that!
Tell her why you are there, also mention your good friend and her book club!. Lift each toddler and pull out your manuscript, try to rearrange the pages as you grope around!. This will get her involved, she will scurry to help and stack them neatly for you on her counter!.
Ah, the mark is now ready for the take down!. With you expressing your the reasons for your dishevelment and symtainiosly the love for your children (manuscript is totally sticky remember, you pull out the disc!.
Improvise, act your poems, lay it on thick, and as you get to walk into the publisher's office, she will be watching the tots!. When you leave there, if you haven't won the publisher over, the boss will make sure you get everything you have asked for!.
You have been the highlight of her week, she will tell the hairdresser, the president of the school committee and the owner of the hardware store!.
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At least with cargo shorts you would have a lot of room to carry your tomes!. Have you ever thought about getting it published in Hope Arkansas!? You could rub shoulders with someone at the same time, I think his name was Bill! Cheap marketing, standing along side Bill in your cargo shorts holding your manuscripts! CNN coverage for sure!Www@QuestionHome@Com

Download the manuscripts to disc, place the disc in a pocket of your cargo shorts and tell Cheapscam Publishing Company to read your masterpieces on-screen!. In no time at all the Work of the Millennium will be published!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Let your fingers do the walking!!.!.!.!. Try Yellow Pages and find a carrier!.!. Word to the wise don`t wear socks and sandals!. !. You can keep your hat on!. Good luck my good man!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Hilarious!.

Have the manuscripts delivered by carrier pigeon!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Don't worry about your height and deliver them anyway!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Ohhh, Arkansas is a long way from Italy!. Save your self the trouble of travel and just make a bunch of paper airplanes!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

burn it, it's the best thing you can do for the worldWww@QuestionHome@Com

Hire the midget that lives next door in the tent!.!.!.he can grab his trike and be there within days!.!.!.good luck my friend!.!.!.Godspeed midgetWww@QuestionHome@Com

Pack your sack
Pop the whip
Make the trip

And meet me by the duck boats in Hot Springs!.!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Pony expressWww@QuestionHome@Com

Wear clogs and gel your hair straight up!. That way you'll be taller than Sarkozy!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Call Buk up, and see if he would like to do the "delivery" for a couple of "sausages"!Www@QuestionHome@Com

This content, today

Sets new forth for a standard

Making space for wonderWww@QuestionHome@Com

Wear hip waders and Ta Duh!!.!.
:)Www@QuestionHome@Com

No way can I compete with Ronnie's answer!. lolWww@QuestionHome@Com