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Position:Home>Poetry> Well, hows this for a melancholy poem?Question: Well, hows this for a melancholy poem!? I think I'm screaming, But I have yet to make a sound!. My mind tells me I'm standing, But I know I've hit the ground!. I try to let myself decide, and trust my decisions are free of fail!. But I've been torn too much now, and poked by this taunting nail!. I feel so stupid, I trust too much in false hope and petty surprises!. There are many faces they have, too many distinct disguises!. I have had it with this depth that engulfs me in, I've let myself down to often, and introduced myself to too much sin!. Theres this sickness that lives inside me, a fidgeting burning in my cells!. I guess I can count on my tears to extinguish, when all else fails!. Still, I need this hope, where the sickness is born!. I'll deal with the consequences, though I really wasn't warned!. I know I can get back up, but I need a hand to progress!. It makes no sense that where I need you more, you need me less!.Www@QuestionHome@Com Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: It's beautiful! I really like the use of language and rhyming - I think it's really clever!. It is very melancholy!.!.!.very sad!. I love the way the first line is the shortest - I think it makes a really good beginning!. Congrats! That's a really good poem(much better than i could ever do;D) Have you got a name for it!?Www@QuestionHome@Com " I need you more !.!.!.!. you need me less!.!.!." Will sum up well A broken union ! But your poem presents one Who's trying to learn about one's own self Plus the others in his / her life, And has all the potential To guide himself / herself well!. Your melancholy poem is good, And you can make it better by polishing it a little!. And !.!.!.!.!.!. , Why melancholy !? Why not mellow into Good Cheer ! Life is short, Make the best of it !Www@QuestionHome@Com I think its quite melancholy it captures the unhappy mood well through the use of emotive language descriptive, captivating and good use of imagery Www@QuestionHome@Com pretty deep!. and dark!. and, well, melancholy!.Www@QuestionHome@Com Beautiful really! I can associate with it!. The last two lines are too good!. If u r really in such a situation, i wish u luck to 'get back up'!. Believe in urself !.!.!.!.!.=) Www@QuestionHome@Com more my style, girl!.Www@QuestionHome@Com |