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Question: For all you lost lovers!. i made a poem!. comments!?
A walk upon an evening pier
Love without face
Without reminder
It hasn't a ghost
Peripherally steered
I've been given
A lure
I place without fear
Wrinkle in water
Fever in flame
Last in love
Found nothing of shame

A walk upon an evening pier
A love without kiss
Without interfere
He hasn't let know
Pensively steered
I've been given
A face
I look without fear
Wrinkle in water
Fever in flame
Lest in love
Found something that came

A walk upon an evening pier
A love without proof
Without prisoner
He hasn't the ring
Predominately steered
I've been given
A kiss
I give without fear
Wrinkle in water
Fever in flame
Lust in love
Found someone to blame

A walk upon an evening pier
A love without mistake
Without an error
He hasn't his other
Passionately steered
I've been given
A ring
I know without fear
Wrinkle in water
Fever in flame
Lost in love
Found someone I claim

A walk upon an evening pier
A love without
Without him here
He hasn't the love
Passively steered
I've been given
A ghost
A haunting love spear
Now can't live without
This reminder
Wrinkle in water
Fever in flame
Left in love
Found lost in rainWww@QuestionHome@Com


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
I really like the repetition - it builds up a nice rhythm and also the sense of longing!. It is kind of long but I don't think it's lacking for that - it actually makes it have a nice beat to it!.

Keep at it :)Www@QuestionHome@Com

It is a little difficult to understand!. And I suggest that you enter a little rhyme to your future poems!. I surely agree that it is a poem about love, but it is rather long!. But I really admire your ability to create such complicated poems!. Awesome!Www@QuestionHome@Com

I think it could be a song, because it has that sing-song, melodious feel (but given the subject matter, is contrastingly!.!.!. dark)!.

Anyway, the poem is amazing :)Www@QuestionHome@Com

I LIKE ITWww@QuestionHome@Com

long but i like it!Www@QuestionHome@Com