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Question: *******little poem*******!?
i just want to know if you like it!. what do you think!?
A cold silver river of hard winter water
Upon a night of a dance with her skates and her father
Her blades cut the ice with such elegant strides
She hides in his arms than flies out like a kite
He chased her again, her giggles flood behind
Her dark bouncy curls that tickle her eyes
She was lifted off the ice and kissed on the head
And was carried away like a princess out of bed
He twirled her around holding close to his daughter
Her tiny fingers gripped tight the thumb of her father
His skates danced her slowly as she rest upon his shoulder
He kissed her again before she got older
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Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
wow it jsut!.!.!. idk it somehow sparkles! very good!!!!
creative, fresh, nice rhymes, and easy to read!. i like it! you got talent!
the only thing id tell you to improve on, just to make it even better, is a couple of the lines dont really rhyme very well, like kite and behind!. you could try changing it to her giggles flood the night, or something like that, so it rhymed better!. also, i dont think you should rhyme father twice in the poem!.
but thats just me being picky, its really good!!Www@QuestionHome@Com
I like it!. It shows the bond between a father and his daughter at a young age!. I've always been my daddy's little girl!. It reminds me of a song that recently came out by Steven Curtis Chapman!. He wrote the song for his adopted daughter and tragedy happened, his 16 year old son accidentally backed over her and killed her!. He is now touring and singing the song but it's amazing!. I liked your poem because it reminded me not only of my relationship with my father but the song!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Wow!. This is really good!. It even gave me goose-bumps!. I think you've got something here!. :) It's rythmic, sentimental, easily understood, and uniquely original!. Keep up the good work hun!. :) <3Www@QuestionHome@Com