Position:Home>Poetry> Um...just honestly curious, are my poems any good?

Well, i was thinking of giving this to my boyfriend!.!.!.so any advice would help!. Rate and critique please!. And read the other one too!.!.!.but i'm not giving the second one to him!.!.!.just the first!.


You have always been the one,
Who took my breath away!.
You’re all that I could think about,
Every night and day!.

I have always liked you,
And you said you have too!.
You said that love for me,
Was all you ever knew!.

Now we are together,
And nothing can go wrong!.
I can only describe our love
As “nothing is that strong!.”

I always dream about you,
Every time I sleep at night!.
And I am constantly wishing,
That you were in my sight!.

While I’m writing this,
I’m gazing at the moon,
Knowing that our love is pure,
And we’ll be together soon!.


And this one was when i was just venting when my sister used me!.!.!.again!.!.!.:(


DEVIL’S KISS:

I can’t stand to be mad,
My anger cold, my heart bad,
I always hate to be used,
My soul forever torn and bruised!.

But still my sister does it,
And it wasn’t right, was it!?
That she was bad, and I was good,
And she got the strength like I knew she would!.

She got the strength to resist it, to fight,
And even though I tried will all of my might,
To have the strength to fight and resist,
By the devil, I was still kissed!.

He lured my into his traps of depression,
Anger and fury becoming a main session!.
But I blocked it out the best that I could,
And I hid my broken self, under my hood!.

I find myself laughing at the madness inside,
Insanity taking over, my old happy self died!.
I try to hold on, to grasp it, to be,
To try to hold on, to the happy and real me!.

But eventually my fighters fell,
And even thought they fought so well,
I could not help but to sit back and weep,
As the following thoughts ran through my head, the ones I would keep…

“This is the end,
let reality bend,
as I close my eyes,
knowing my soul dies!.”

I have copywright on them!. My teacher made me do that!.!.!.unnecessary as it may be, but still usefull!.

So like i said!. Please rate and tell me how i can improve!. PLEASE!
And please be honest, if i am no good, would you be kind enough to tell me before i embarrass my self
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