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Question: Do you like my poem!? It's about writing poems :-)!?
I'd like to write a poem
Something moving, something wise
I'd like my words to linger on
Long after my demise
I'd like to write of daffodils
And lonely, wand'ring clouds
Of sailing ships and sealing wax
Of marriages and shrouds
But all the while I sit here
It's not my voice that I hear
It's the golden tones of poets past
That whisper in my ear
Have all the noblest words been writ!?
Has it all been said before!?
Will there ever be a place for me
Upon that swollen shore!?
If I close my eyes and listen
For a voice that's fresh and clear
Will there ever be the slightest chance
It's my voice that I hear!?Www@QuestionHome@Com
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
Excellent!. Better than the majority of "poetry" I stumble across on this site - in my opinion of course ;)
In particular, your rhyming feels very natural and convincing, and the final line of three or four of your five stanzas are very effective!.
Two things to constructively criticize: the line 'It's not my voice that I hear' strains the metre for me - removing 'thats' will straighten this out; and, as someone else picked up on too, the phrase "swollen shore" feels a bit meaningless!. Where has this shore come from!? What shore!?! Do dead poets hang about on a beach!? What could this possibly mean!? -- It feels a bit romanticised for romanticising's sake!.
Good work though!. I can tell that you know what you're doing!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Writing poetry:
I write poetry myself
It maybe about memories
or in memory of someone
it could be one thing or several
I have done a number of poms
like the river, seasons!.
What is involved!.
One I did a lot on was friends
love, these are beautiful
along with nature!.
Sitting somewhere where its quiet
and start writing!.
-
Your poem is like mine
at least something in common!.
Www@QuestionHome@Com
I think it's great!. If you want constructive criticism, I'd recommend changing swollen shore to something else because it was a little unclear to me what that meant!. (But maybe that's just me :) I think it's a great example of Ars Poetica!. Hope I helped! :)Www@QuestionHome@Com
You should use quotation marks around the "cabbages and kings" line!. The rest is pretty good!. Your rhyming is not too hard, sometimes very sweet!. You have poetic talent!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
lovely poem!.!.!.!.!.!.just a suggestion if i may to give the last line a better balance!.!.!.!.its my voice that i will hear!.!.!.!.!.!.!.then again !.!.what do i know!.!.I'm just a old fart!.!.!.!.seamanab xWww@QuestionHome@Com
Your voice has been heard!. All good poets compare themselves to the Master poets!. You show a great deal of talent in this poem!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
you write like thunder
you write with pride
like seeing your words
on this pencil rideWww@QuestionHome@Com
top marks
well done
:]Www@QuestionHome@Com
You had my attention, throughout!.!.!.Thanks for sharing!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
i like u r poem!.its nice!.Www@QuestionHome@Com