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Question: Critque my poem!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!.!.!.
trapped in an empty dessert within my dreams
slowly dying, no escape
as sand start to slowly fall upon me
i sit there crying to take away the pain that been done
everything starts to turn dark
my hopes and dreams fade away
my life crashes down as sand fills up to my neck
all hope is lost
my future is futile
as the sand slowly starts to cover my mouth
i find myself laying on my bed!.





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Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
I hate it when I get trapped inside an empty ice cream bowl tooWww@QuestionHome@Com

http://answers!.yahoo!.com/question/index;!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Honestly!? It was okay!. A nice attempt but it could still use some work!. Keep trying though, some day you'll write a masterpiece : )Www@QuestionHome@Com

i lOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVVVVEEEEE it

its awesome!.
its sad but its awesome the way u wrote it!.!.!. good job

write me a poem!.!.!.=)Www@QuestionHome@Com

You need to see a therapistWww@QuestionHome@Com

I think it was very good :)Www@QuestionHome@Com

i love the wow words your usingWww@QuestionHome@Com

weird sad grossWww@QuestionHome@Com