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Question: Care to tell me what you think about these poems!?
He has got a taste for
blood!?
love!?
He has got her voice in his mind!.
She won't leave, she won't get out,
He can't figure!.!.!.
Whats this about!?
Sometimes he can taste her kiss
Sometimes he wants her
body!?
corpse!?
His mind is losing it!.
Her voice is
fading!.!.!.

Here is my second poem:

She was looking deep inside herself
she was looking for the texture
the taste of her soul
She was trying to find a maze
a way to get lost in her mind
what she found was a padded cell
and the color white
He was her lover
the reason she wanted
to be lost in the beginning
the reason she wanted to stay that way
His voice is what told her the commands
His voice was that of the devil's advocate
She danced with him in the pale moonlight
She let him hold her tight
He created the grey with in her mind
plant the seed to change wrong to right
Oh she had fallen in love with the wrong sort of man
This man was no man at all
He went by many names
but this is the tale of Insanity
He courted her with a simple rose
a few fancy tales
and what else
only God knows
She is nothing but a vegetable now
simply in love with Insanity
simply in love with the idea of being
crazy
its probably the only thing
that keeps her going in the world
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Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
The first one is about a vampire I take it!. It's not bad!. Could use a little more thought, I mean there's not much I take away from it that's memorable!.

The second one seems like it's all He, She, He, His, She, and it's quite confusing to make the connection of any real thought pattern there!. I would suggest write down the story you're trying to convey then rearrange the words in the form of a poem!. She fell in love with being crazy!? Maybe i'm missing the point!. Sorry, I didn't get it!.

Keep writing, your soul will thank you for it!. Www@QuestionHome@Com

These are pretty deep and Dark your really good at righting these <333
wish i could bee thiss deep!.

But congratss!!!Www@QuestionHome@Com