I just wrote this poem, will you tell me what you think?

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Question:

i've slowly driven myself insane!.
but i find myself
still calling your name!.

i sit and watch in silence,
as life passes me by!.
wishing for a happy ending
but all around me i hear cries!.

my definition of insanity
is letting you go!.
so many chances i've had
!.!.so many chances i've blown!.

my mind gets in the way
of everything i do!.
medicine, making me better!?
or making me blue!?

these decisions,
i don't make on my own!.
noone understands,
i'm never alone!.

I've lost you once,
I've lost you twice,
I've lost my heart,
i've lost my mind!.

i can't hurt you anymore,
i have to put my foot down
no matter how much it breaks me
i can't turn around

time to say goobye,
and thank you for the gifts you have given me
just don't forget,
you're always with me!.

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Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

Sounds a bit like song lyrics!. I like the true rhymes and the slant rhymes!. I am not sure if you are going for a minimal use of capitalization on purpose or if you are waiting to fix it!. That is, one of your stanzas capitalizes "I" almost every time, but the other ones don't!. I think the strongest line in the poem is "My definition of insanity is letting you go!." I'm a little confused by the "cries" heard all around, if they come from the speaker of the poem or if it is more of the general pain of the population!. Www@QuestionHome@Com

I see depression in here
The first paragraph talks about
she is gone!. This kind of pain
leaves you calling her name,
any image would be hallucination
causing insanity!.

It takes two people to make decisions
not just one!.
You lost her once twice
as a result the heart and mind are gone!.

Whatever happened
you will not forget her
for all the person gave you!.
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I really like it just the last part you could change it to instead of your always with me to you'll always be mine or you'll always be on my mine something like that but ut was really goodWww@QuestionHome@Com

I really like it! !.!.!.!.lil miss cookie read way too far into it! lol =) !.!.!.!.she is a smart cookie tho! Www@QuestionHome@Com

wow hun,that is really good!.

:)Www@QuestionHome@Com