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Question: Your thoughts on this poem I just wrote!?
This is in memory of my Grandfather!.
I have honestly never attempted to write a poem before, it just came to me!.
(Hopefully the title is correct, my French is horrible!.)

It is called "Gloire dans le Silence"!.

A lasting sound
from the tranquil tap of his hands,
the withered hands
of the piano man's floating melody
is a darling sound to behold!.
yet there is glory in silence,
as you play your last song without stirring!.
the closing song fades into a memory,
that will never be forgotten!.

I didn't edit this or anything similar, and would appreciate your thoughts on this poem!?Www@QuestionHome@Com


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
Well, for somebody who has never written a poem before, you are very talented!. So basically, you're describing your grandfather playing a song on the piano, but then also showing the meaning behind his new silence that lets you remember him!.

The only suggestion that I would have is improving how you divide your poem, or adding different punctuation, just so it flows a little better!. So maybe dividing it like this:

"A lasting sound from the tranquil tap of his hands;
the withered hands of the piano man's floating melody,
is a darling sound to behold!.
Yet there is glory in silence,
as you play your last song without stirring!.
The closing song fades into a memory,
that will never be forgotten!."

I think you did a really good job; your grandfather would be proud!.
Hope I could be of help!.
Www@QuestionHome@Com

that's pretty good :)
could flow a little better!.!.!. but it's awesome for a first try !Www@QuestionHome@Com

wow!. that poem is beautiful!. really great job!
:) Www@QuestionHome@Com