I found it impressive
Her sunburnt skin was soaking slick
I found it suggestive
Her dolled up face was careless chic
It was her impresses
That I found in her interests
Of soul
And more
Of her aromaWww@QuestionHome@Com
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Position:Home>Poetry> Is this beter?Question: Is this beter!? I found it impressive
Her sunburnt skin was soaking slick I found it suggestive Her dolled up face was careless chic It was her impresses That I found in her interests Of soul And more Of her aromaWww@QuestionHome@Com Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: It doesn't sound so forced this time, but I think you lost some of the meaning in the first stanza!. And I don't think you need the last line!. "Of soul / And more" makes her aroma unimportant!. ^^Www@QuestionHome@Com Your chic must be cheek It was her impresses must be "It was through her impressiveness" You finished your poem in a hanging form!. And so as to make a rhyming, kindly add !.!.!.!.Of her aroma and aura!.Www@QuestionHome@Com It's perfect Help me plz http://answers!.yahoo!.com/question/index;!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com Ruv ItWww@QuestionHome@Com beautiful :DWww@QuestionHome@Com |