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Question: Do you like my poem!?!? it doesnt make that much sense i guess but i was letting out emotions :]!.!.!?
i cant take it
i want to let go
i need to break free
but i just cant go
im trying but the pain is to much
as i pick up this knife and make a deep cut
both of my wrists now bleed and hurt
but soon the pain will be no more
i can takeit for now
like i always have
& as i slowly drift away and lean back my head
im thinking over everything and everybody that have hurt me
but theres to much
now as i sit here getting dizzier and dizzier
i realize there was one
someone
someone that actully loved me

that one person in my life
the only one that ever did
so i try to get up and reach for the phone
i dial 911
i stutter and start to fall while i tell them what ive done
the last thing i remembered was saying call him
once i was awake with my head resting on a hospital pillow and ivs in my arms
i hear a faint noise
it was him
he was here
he was here for me
he was sitting in a chair across from mybed
he was crying and leaning down his head
i whisper his name and he comes over to my side
i kiss him lightly as he says "im sorry i lied"
i can tell he really means it
i whisper "i love you"
and he says "and i always have"Www@QuestionHome@Com


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
Thats beautiful!.
If you dont take classes then you are a true poet!.
5/5
10/10
100/100Www@QuestionHome@Com

people will definitely judge this poem because of the cutting wrists!. most people do!. (not saying that i am, i'm just a philosopher helping out!.)

i like this poem a lot, and you should seriously consider making something like this into a song!. it'll work out!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Good, but unrealistic!. A non suicidal example would have served your poem better!
Good, because you were able to relate how
much despair you were feeling!. (Trade the knife for a pen!.) You have talent!
(I'm really sorry for your loss)Www@QuestionHome@Com

yes!. awesome
what about mine

hard games!. worth the pain!. getting better every second i play!. every day is another day but the same in a way i cannot explain!. its like never living yesterdayWww@QuestionHome@Com

aw its deep and scary but nice!. it made sense to me!. i like it but like i said a little scary!. but poems are always good forms to express and let out your feelings and emotions!. =]Www@QuestionHome@Com

Very emotional, very expressive, very depressing!. If that was your intended purpose you made it!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

why do most poems and emo stuff have to do with wrists and cutting!.!.no!.!.!.no!.!.!.no try the vein on the left buttcheek!.!.less pain!.!.and gess wghat !.!.you wont dieWww@QuestionHome@Com

woow!.!. Thats really deep in thought but it's really good!.

I think because some people find that writing is the best way of expressing your feelings, you made this sound unique!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

it has good emotion but it doesn't flow very well mabey try condensing and rewording a littleWww@QuestionHome@Com

Hide the razor bladesWww@QuestionHome@Com

mmm ye its gd!.


I would use more complicated words, and metaphors!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Wow!. You need help!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

That was good!. I almost cried!. I hope that you come to happier times soon!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

I'm sure all the emo kids had to change their pants after reading that!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

aww!.!.!. thats beautiful, sweet and depressing all at once!. as for a poem!.!.!. meh, its alrightWww@QuestionHome@Com

Omg!. get a freaking hooker!. ****Www@QuestionHome@Com

I don't like emo poems!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

its very intense!.!.!.!.i like it!.!.it has so much emotion coming from it!.!.!.!.but CHEER UP!Www@QuestionHome@Com

awww! i almost cried!.!.!.!.!.!.!.

ok i did a little

lolWww@QuestionHome@Com