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Question: I had to write a poem on opinion for English!.!.!. any pointers would be really appreciated!?
The Truth

With 6 billion people
Around in our world,
There are thousands more voices
More thoughts to be heard!.

And when it all becomes too loud
Then the law will kick in
Cos if everyone said everything
How can anyone win!?

It’s good to have opinion,
It’s OK to speak,
But there’s no point when words
Cause the feel of incomplete!.

Opinions, so thoughtful,
So deep and so strong,
When two can collide
Well, that’s when it goes wrong!.

But the troubles don’t stop there
A problem earth just can’t solve,
There are more than two opinions
That want to take control!.

There are hundreds and thousands
And not one the same,
So you see if they meet
Then the roar won’t be tamed!.

They are meeting already
And you wouldn’t think so
But if I asked you “What’s war!?”
I bet you wouldn’t know!.

But all it is, is a clash
Of sides, each one deaf
From the others opinion
Nothing more, nothing less!.

And as more seem to arrive
Then the two sides will grow,
Until the way to control numbers
Is to kill those below!.

And the pain is unreal
It’s blind from the eye,
But trust me, it’s hard
To watch your own mother cry!.




And it’s worse on the kids
You feel you have to stay strong,
You can’t cry in front of family
Act like you don’t know what’s wrong!.

But the truth is you do
And the pain that this brings,
To know your cousin – shot down
Because of one little thing!.

Someone’s thoughts, their beliefs
Of what’s wrong from right
Exploded and it’s your family,
Inside their line of sight!.

And it’s you paying the price
For what you didn’t buy,
The gun that shot the helicopter
Right out the sky!.

It really makes you think
And from experience, I know
If there were no opinions
No war would take hold!.

There’d be no need for fighting
No clash of two worlds,
No one else would lose family
We could melt the freezing cold!.Www@QuestionHome@Com


Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
wow!. dont listen to them, its a beautiful expression of you!. I know when I write anything I never want it to end, if i would have wrote a poem I would have wrote it that long too!!! Its wonderful I read the whole thing, and dont change a thing, add me if u ever need someone to talk to!. :D
-DemiWww@QuestionHome@Com

I liked your use of rhyming couplets - broken into 2nd and 4th!.
nice idea :D
Some of your half rhymes spoilt the effect for me at times!.
Lovely, punctuation and grammar!.!.!.only problem is that it is far too long!.
Consider condensing your thoughts!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

You've drawn upon too much negativity!.
different Opinions can also be grounds for debate!.!.!.!.which in turn can be beneficial to society!.!.!.!.eg!. different opinions in science can lead to different branches of, lets say, treatments of diseases!.!.!.!.eg!. cancer!.!.!.!.etcWww@QuestionHome@Com

You've got it totally right brill grammer and everythingWww@QuestionHome@Com

not really poetry, it doesn't condense meaningWww@QuestionHome@Com

sorry its faaaaar too long!.!.!.!.!.!!!.!.needs to be snappyWww@QuestionHome@Com

i like it(:Www@QuestionHome@Com