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Question: I miss u !.!.!.opinions plzzzzzz!?
When I am lonely and hope is gone
I remember you, everything you've done
I look for you in every place
I see your smile on every face
I hear your voice whenever rain falls
When I am lonely I miss your calls
I miss the way you treated me
I miss the wonders you made me see
I miss the joy you brought to my life
Every moment without you cuts as a knife
I miss your eyes, your attentive ears
I miss you a day as if for years
Above these all I greatly miss
Your tender lips, your passionate kiss
I miss the times I sang for you
Today I 'll die of missing you
I miss you near and I miss you far
I miss you when with me you are
I miss you and want you back soon
For long my nights have missed their moon!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
that is soooo incredibly beautiful! you really let your heart spill out on paper and THAT'S how the best poems are written! seriously though, i was almost crying! i feel for you!.
Today I 'll die of missing you
I miss you near and I miss you far
I miss you when with me you are
I miss you and want you back soon
For long my nights have missed their moon!.
i think you should change the "today" to "tonight" because that is how i read it, and since night seems the lonliest time to me, i think it's appropriate!. if you say "tonight" it creates an image of you lying lonely in bed and thinking of this person every night!. i like that image!. also, "i miss you when with me you are"!? i see that you are focusing on rhyming and that's great, i admire that, i think it's what made the rest of the poem so good, but why do you miss them when they are with you!? that line doesn't make sense!. in the 2nd to last line i think you should say "back REAL soon" because it fits in the rhythm!. and i LOVE the last line because i also love the moon, and i see how you are comparing this person to a light in the dark of your life, but maybe you should reword it a little!.!.!.!.not totally sure about that one!.
anyways, AMAZING, i like (why am i saying like i mean LOOOVE) it!. KEEP WRITING PLEASE!Www@QuestionHome@Com
That was gorgeous! Especially the end metaphor!
Read my poem ---------> http://answers!.yahoo!.com/question/index;!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
AMAZING:D!Www@QuestionHome@Com
I know EXACTLY how you feel!!! It is amazing, and beautiful!Www@QuestionHome@Com
very very nice poem! i know how you feel also but very deep!. Great Job!Www@QuestionHome@Com
Wow!! That is really good and very deep!! AMAZING!!!! I seriously LOVE it!!! You should become a professional!!Www@QuestionHome@Com