Position:Home>Poetry> A Sonnet: Care to Comment?
Question: A Sonnet: Care to Comment!?
I can see your face, as the sun rises
I can see your smile, as you look at me
I can hear your laugh, a soft pleasantry
I can feel your love, life filled with prizes
As I watch you walk, I see confidence
As I hear you talk, words elate my heart
As I taste your kiss, burning passion starts
As I feel your breathe, I live its cadence
The love that we hold, no one can interrupt
A constant state of we, union divine
A constant state of us, true love design
The love that we hold, hate can not corrupt
Take my hand in yours, walk this road of life
A vow of forever, husband and wifeWww@QuestionHome@Com
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
You are a wonderful man who loves his wife so much that he doesn't mind writing sweet, sappy, sentimental verses that are the envy of Hallmark!. And I don't care that this is not the equal of Shakespeare!. It's straight from the heart and I like it!Www@QuestionHome@Com
Unfortunately, the lifelong vow you so elegantly illustrate is rare in these days of fear of commitment!. This is a passionate love poem with fine imagery!. I especially like "A constant state of we/us!."Www@QuestionHome@Com
It doesn't rhyme well!. Why don't you try writing about something more creative!? Maybe try to refer to nature in the poem to give it more originality!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
OMG!.!.!.amazing!. I love it!. You should copyright it cuz people are gonna steal it away from you and use it at their own weddings (me!)!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Beautifully written!.!.!.I think this is one to read at the wedding!Www@QuestionHome@Com