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A handful of sand
Flows between every finger
Caught but not captured
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Position:Home>Poetry> I made another of those Buk Fuku thingies...do you like it?Question: I made another of those Buk Fuku thingies!.!.!.do you like it!? *****
A handful of sand Flows between every finger Caught but not captured *****Www@QuestionHome@Com Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: Very nice!. It's true; so much can be said with so little!.Www@QuestionHome@Com you are right but I notice that some simply call the English form of haiku English haiku!. I like your Fuku's label for its quirky nature!. (An English syllable is a kena , a calligraphic character in Japanese and is as oranges are to apples!.) This Buk Fuku of yours is in my opinion quite literally perfect!. Issa!.!. a Japanese haiku master wrote : (English translation which is why in English it does not follow the 5-7-5 formula) reed warbler sings the great river still You have captured the very essence of haiku!. The moment of our awareness of the bird's song the river stops becoming ! You have gone one step further!.!. and applied metaphor the hand is the haiku/fuku attempting to capture the sand!. This technique is acceptable in English haiku or fuku but in haiku western techniques ( metaphor) are not accepted!. So for the sake of authenticity and perfection it would be possible to ignore the use of metaphor and read the moment only!. Too much analysis perhaps but there is no way there can be any criticism of this work!. It is brilliant and beautiful!. You have a lovely mind!Www@QuestionHome@Com I like it!. Never heard of Fuku, only Haiku, but does it really matter what label is put on it, as long as the reader enjoys it!?Www@QuestionHome@Com Buk Fuku is the structure!? As always I am intriqued by the thought structure behind the work!.Www@QuestionHome@Com I am not familiar with this form but this poem has grace and depth!. It is impressive how much meaning and thought can be expressed in just twelve words!. I love this one!. Thank you!.Www@QuestionHome@Com yeah i like it its creative, peacefull, makes you think a bit it's shows a resemblance of life!. i love it!.Www@QuestionHome@Com This sounds like a Haiku to me, or at the very least, a Senryu; it is not a Fuku!.Www@QuestionHome@Com I like it!. Put it on the wall and capture it!.Www@QuestionHome@Com Do one with buknaked!.Www@QuestionHome@Com Yes, it's good!.Www@QuestionHome@Com |