A piece about blind love. I'm curious what others think about it?

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Question:

Furthermore

A man asks a woman to be his wife
Mix emotions and live this life
Wanting so much her by his side
Sure of himself with his new bride

They share with each other talking for hours
Thinks of her when gone thinks to send flowers
Craves the whole package loves her style
His hardest heart melts at her smile

Hard to explain he can’t understand
He feels that is part of being a man
She keeps him off balance somewhat unsure
She knows what he likes makes him want more

They give of each other 2 equals a team
They talk of tomorrow an image a dream
Entwined in their love their hearts aglow
The world is theirs or so they think so

@rad121801Www@QuestionHome@Com

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

I find it beautiful!. Just what I wanted to read tonight!.
:-)
T!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

I think it's pretty decent, but it needs a bit of work!. Firstly, you need to interweave more emotion in this piece by showing!. Because with the predictable rhyme structure and the "telling", it is nearly devoid of emotion!. So, you should show how the man proposing to his wife!. SHOW how they talk for hours and how she makes him feel!. Because if you show instead of tell by using imagery, it would give more depth and emotion to this poem!.

Thanks for sharing!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

That was so good but it didnt have alot of emotion but it was very good=)Www@QuestionHome@Com

I think it is very romantic and could be true of many couples!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Good poem!. I think with a few changes it would flow better!.Www@QuestionHome@Com