"promises"
Sky gray as Eeyore's pelt,
fog lays down it's wings!.
On rocky restless soil,
someplace I've never been!.
Life, cold as a rejection,
complains in moody silence!.
Promises made in moonbeams,
they vanish like a dream!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
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Position:Home>Poetry> My final poem of the evening. Do you like it.?Question: My final poem of the evening!. Do you like it!.!? "promises"
Sky gray as Eeyore's pelt, fog lays down it's wings!. On rocky restless soil, someplace I've never been!. Life, cold as a rejection, complains in moody silence!. Promises made in moonbeams, they vanish like a dream!.Www@QuestionHome@Com Best Answer - Chosen by Asker: I particularly like the last 2 lines!. Promises made in moonbeams Vanish like a dream!. Sums up the feeling of the entire piece and says volumes with few words!.Www@QuestionHome@Com I can tell that your imagination is bleeding throughout this entire poem, and that you almost lost consciousness when writing it, because only your sub-conscious "feelings" are displayed!. it clearly is beautiful to you, and that's all that should matter!. NEVER ask other people what they think of your achievements, ask yourself what YOU think!. if you love it (a) Get it published ^!.^, or (b) Keep it to yourself Take care, Gemma xxWww@QuestionHome@Com I hate to say this!. But, I hate it!. 'Moonbeams' has been used in more poems than I can count!. 'Cold as a rejection' is a bland description!. I also feel that you could have been more creative in describing the soil!. I already know soil is rocky!. Tell me something deeper!Www@QuestionHome@Com i love it!. expect the eeyore line is weird!. answer please: http://answers!.yahoo!.com/question/index;!.!.!. oh and thankyou for answering ^_^ your a really good poet btw!.Www@QuestionHome@Com AWWWWW!:] i like it a lot !.!.!.!.!.you should do it for a living if you really like itWww@QuestionHome@Com I feel that!Www@QuestionHome@Com I do and very much, short and to the point!!Www@QuestionHome@Com |