My first attempt at an etheree? What do you think?

Question: My first attempt at an etheree!? What do you think!?

I don't know how many syllables you start out with, and this probably doesn't flow too well!. Feel free to give constructive criticism!. Here it is:

Silent Manipulation

She does not even need to say a word;
She waits for her bidding to be done!.
They scuttle nearby, so servile!.
She puts a cold stare in place;
She shows no gratitude!.
Serving is enough
For these lowly
Ones!. All they
Need is
Work!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

I do not know the rules so I can offer no real help there!.!.!. yet!. BUT, this shows talent and creativity!. I would love to see you write something that is not bound to this narrowing form!.!.!. Thank you for sharing!

Blessed Be, SirenWww@QuestionHome@Com

I think it is really good and doesn't need much improving!. Maybe replace she with something else!. What imspired you anyway!?

Read my poems!?

http://answers!.yahoo!.com/question/index;!.!.!.
http://answers!.yahoo!.com/question/index;!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

As far as Etheree's go, the form is perfect!. I wouldn't change a thing!. Well done!.

TemariWww@QuestionHome@Com