A poem filled with metaphors. Please read :) havent got the last line right yet.

Question: A poem filled with metaphors!. Please read :) havent got the last line right yet!.!?

I'm dissapearing
Like a falling star's wake
Memories fadding
Like reflections off the break
My cold heart fell through the night

A light house tower
Against the abysmal sea
Watching the stars
Life watches me
Slowly Distinguish from site

The echo of thunder
Against a ship's bows
Death's sunder
The stormy wind howls
For what might!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

It is kind of depressing, but if it expresses how you feel, that is okay!.
disappearing, fading,

What does "Slowly distinguish from site" mean!?
Do you mean, "slowly extinguish from sight"!?
What is death sundering!? The bows or the wind!?
You might want to say, "Death sunders!.!.!.!." as in "death tears apart" instead of Death's sunder which means "Death is in posession of a rip"

Keep working on it, has potential thereWww@QuestionHome@Com

the first stanza are similiesWww@QuestionHome@Com