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Question: Quick write, would you comment!?
Lone I am, but a stained brush
That dripped with greyest shades
Now it longs for the blooming rush
But a destined love fills my gates
With gentlest strokes I breathe
The faded blue of rotting sea
For the night shall soon me lead
A crimson sea that destined me
I hear the clock is stained of amber
Haunts the soul to come a knocking
Now owl has settled in my chamber
As if sensed a mellow lurking
I sit to see it stands complete
Two doves by the empty sea
Empty stares for hues deplete
Evermore, my love and meWww@QuestionHome@Com
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
Let it sit for a few days!.!.!.then revisit!. Have someone read it to you out loud after you've had a chance to let its true meaning subside!.!.!.then take a fresh look at it!. You will see and hear things that you didn't notice before, and will be in a more objective frame of mind!. You have some good lines, but you also have some that border on nonsense!. You have a good poetic voice, but I think you rushed this one to print!.!.!.take a fresh look at it and then, when you've finished editing, repost it for comment!.
!.!.!.keep writingWww@QuestionHome@Com
Use more concretion than abstraction, so that you'll involve the reader!. also, avoid cliches, they freeze the meaning!.
Good luck!. ^_^Www@QuestionHome@Com
Its excellent i enjoyed it alot now please answer my question!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Very cool! Definitely my kinda style!. Keep up the good work!Www@QuestionHome@Com