Can you take a look at my poem and critique it for me? Titled: The Inner Child?

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Question:

The Inner Child

I sit upon this windy shore!.
amid the salty air!.
My senses explore,
with a venturing mind,
while my heart, it beats a rhythm!.

Distant waves gracefully dance,
elegantly and melodically so!.
Moody waters confront ill fate,
crashing rocks a million years!.

Exquisite is the beauty,
emotions settle in!.
Regretful tears, enchanting laughter,
time-faded echoes of youth!.

In wonderment, I gaze in awe,
how amazing it is to me,
born so gently and tenderly blessed
upon this gracious coast!.

My fingers trace my fresh clear tears
through pure and grainy sand!.
An inner voice startles me,
awakened from my daze!.

"Do not cry in thoughts of me,
I'm only as far as you allow!."
And with an all too innocent laugh,
the voice fades along with the sun!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

Hi Juliette,

Please don't take this in the wrong way I do have one piece of advice and I only mean it to be helpful!. Tone is hard to convey in text!.

Please consider replacing the adjectives and adverbs in the piece with strong verbs and nouns!. When you rely too heavily on qualifiers it weighs the writing down, or put another way it tells when it should show!.

If you work on this point your writing will get stronger!.

All my best,

ToddWww@QuestionHome@Com

This is a simply lovely poem with pathos and beauty in the words!. Your carefully written imagery is stunning- I was right there with you throughout the poem!. The last stanza is very engaging amnd thoughtful, very moving!. It is a subject I really love, too, "The Inner Child"!. Thank you!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

WOA!!!!
that had awesome all over it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :-D

PERFECT !0!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THE BEST POEM I HAVE READ IN WEEKS!!!!!!
I've been here and i've read ppl's poems, but nothing had really POPED until now!!
CONGRATS!!! you have an awesome poem!!Www@QuestionHome@Com

very goodWww@QuestionHome@Com

thats really beautiful!. u r going to be a well established poet one day!
Xx!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!.!. :)Www@QuestionHome@Com