Will you proofread this for me? Am I too full of myself again?

Question: Will you proofread this for me!? Am I too full of myself again!?

Deka 3
Introduction

If poetry had ridden the pop culture wave of the 1960’s and 70’s, Glenn Robert Swetman would hold rock-legend status similar to the kind enjoyed by Mick Jagger and Bruce Springsteen!. His poetic thoughts and ideas describe the wants and needs of modern man in shocking detail!. I particularly enjoy his contemplations on the creature called ‘woman!.’ He must have wrestled with their minds and with their bodies for most of his life!. His understanding of the man/woman dynamic is uncanny!.

I first read Dr!. Swetman’s work last year!. A friend sent me some examples!. Initially, it bothered me because my own writing, in many ways, is a sophomoric attempt at peering through the same glass!. Over and over again, I found myself thinking, “That’s what I meant!.” After reading most of his work over the last three months, I don’t’ worry so much because I know I will probably never be this good!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

Poifect! Where have all the typos gone!?!?!?
I will read him this summer!. I promise!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

This is a great piece of writing which contains not an error!. I like the caps in S-3 because they add stress to the various things you mention!. What I have read of Dr!. Swetman's work is wondrous, as you say!. I am looking forward to reading more and more!. Thank you!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

The same Dr!. Swetman whose name appears in Oh, What a Tangled Web!.!.!.!.!.!.are you sure this question isn't simply a ruse to get us to read works by Elyslund's muse!? (no rhyme intended)

If he's as good as you seem to think, though, I'm game!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Few people can hide where they come from, it shows in their writings!. Science fiction when they write of other worlds you see where they were raised!. I will try to read him this summer but Bubba told Uncle you take me fishing!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Proofread!? I read it 3 times and could not find any mistakes!.
Is that what you're asking!?
It's an excellent tribute to what sounds like an excellent man!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

I found no flaws in this!.!.!.he sounds like an amazing poet and I can not wait to read his work!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

I agree with Sheryl!. As an editor and proofreader, I would have made the same comments!. In addition to the minor edits already commented upon, I would hyphenate "gut-wrenching!." If Deka 3 is truly to be published as an introduction to the professor's work, I would eliminate the sentence in P #2 beginning with "After reading!.!.!." Your comments clearly illustrate Dr!. Swetman's talent, subject matter and history!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

It's very un-verbose, and as it is, I think, supposed to be considered learned and erudite, I would perhaps think about lengthening the sentences; as they read now they sound kind of like they were written by a young child!. Sure all the info is there, and the comparisons are nice, but it's almost in point form, the sentences are so short!.

eg!. For instance:

His poetic thoughts and ideas describe from the inside, the naked desires of modern man in shocking detail; in particular, I would direct you to his contemplations on the creature he called 'woman!.' Judging from his acute understanding and revelations, one can only conclude that he must have wrestled with their minds, bodies and hearts for the bulk of his life!. Indeed, his understanding of the man/woman dynamic is uncanny, and far beyond anything produced by his peers or compatriots!.

See what I'm saying!? Just a suggestion, feel free to poo poo to your heart's content!.

One other quick note: you have an apostrophe after the word don't in the second paragraph!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

The only typos I saw were in the additional details:

"Glenn grew up on the Gulf Coast, in Biloxi Mississippi!. His poetry is rife with Sea Gulls and Cypress trees!. The sights, sounds and smells of Seaweed, Sandpipers and the Southern Live Oak cast theirs spells"

theirs should be their

It may be a style choice but you may want to uncapitalize sea gulls, cypress, seaweed, sandpipers, and southern live oak!.

That's it!. Those nits aside--it is wonderfully written!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

The problem with your intro is threefold as I see it!. First, Dylan was a master poet who put words to music, ignoring a reference to him would beg some questions!. Second, Springsteen did not come along until the late 70's, almost issuing in another resurgence of rock!. And last, it would probably be wise to leave yourself out of the intro unless you are universally known!. Sorry, my two cents worth, I will leave now!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

This is inexcusable!. You have an extra apostrophe after don't on two (count 'em, two) occasions!. And even worse, you misspelled "sturgeon!." Rock legend is not hyphenated!. Okay, okay, in can be hyphenated!. Pfft!. My advice is to leave the state before they throw you into word prison!.

I first read Dr!. Swetman's work in Oh What a Tangled Web and I was extremely impressed!. His was a great contribution to the publication, not to detract from the great contributions to this book by so many other poets, but it was easy to tell that this was a professional poet even without knowing that beforehand!. And don't be so hard on yourself!. You can leave the "probably" out of "never be this good!." *cheesy grin*Www@QuestionHome@Com