Position:Home>Poetry> What do you think of my sad love story ?? be honest please, im only 13 so any cr
Question: What do you think of my sad love story !?!? be honest please, im only 13 so any critasism is good :)!?
A crazy little thing called love
As she stood there, the rain poring down her face, she looked out over the cliff edge!. It wasn’t supposed to be like this she thought!.
4 days ago:
[Boy] “I… I can’t do it!. I'm sorry!.”
[Girl] “I love you,” she whispered!.
[Boy] “I can’t say I love you back anymore, it has too be like this, please don’t make it hard for me,” replied the boy!.
3 days ago:
[Girl] “Look into my eyes and tell me you don’t love me anymore,” Cried the girl, who was desperately holding back tears!.
[Boy] “I … I Don’t love you anymore,” replied the boy, tears streaming down his face as he quickly looked away!. Why wouldn’t she accept it!? He thought, I'm doing this so she is over me, so she shouldn’t hurt!
2 days ago:
[Girl] tries her hardest to call boy, no answer!.
{Later that afternoon}
[Girl] Goes round to Boys house, know body answers door!. She pushes the door open!. She screams!
The boy was laid there in a pool of blood with a gun in his mouth!. He was deWww@QuestionHome@Com
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
I think its great! I could put myself in her postition at the moment he 'dumped' her!. You have great potential!.!.!.Keep on writing!!Www@QuestionHome@Com
I think if you are thirteen you are showing a great deal of promise as a writer, your piece is full of emotion and flows very well!. Keep it up!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
For a thirteen year old, your story is very down beat, unless your a girl, but then again its a tragic love story,,almost like Romero and Juliette!. Please don't try this at homeWww@QuestionHome@Com
Thats really good :) but you have a few spelling errors!.!. thought im guessing their just typing accidents, or lack of key on your keyboard ^^Www@QuestionHome@Com
Move over Daniel Steele!. (smile)Www@QuestionHome@Com
It's so good and now I am depressed lolWww@QuestionHome@Com