The last rewrite i hope for this one. Tell me if I'm right. Brutal honesty p

Question: The last rewrite i hope for this one!. Tell me if I'm right!. Brutal honesty pllease!.!?

"sinequanon 3"

Pale, beyond reproach,
Crowned with pink rose thorns!.
She stands repulsed and rigid,
Disregarding,
insignificant creatures
Cold Immortal hands,
Molten lips taste sweeter!.
Love, fear greets her wearily,
Men die, so many times
Finally, she is home!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

I am not a poet or critic!.!.!.only i can tell is beautiful usage of words with simple emotions!.i like it!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

That's amazing! Keep up the great work man! I wish you the best of luck in the future! Peace!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Looks good to me!. You have great word usage!.Www@QuestionHome@Com