Please rate my poem (1-10)?

Question: Please rate my poem (1-10)!?

BAND

I am from funny pictures,
shouting indoors,
and playing out of turn

I am from maple bars,
Fruit punch,
and tazz cartoons

I am from tenors, trombones
tubas
and baratones

I am fom drumsticks,
drum sets,
and instrament demos

i am from dis ires*,
cumberland cross*
and groove bug*

I am from alfys pizza,
dairy queen
and charter busses

I am from paper fights
and turning out the light in the band room
I AM FROM BANDWww@QuestionHome@Com

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

9 !/2 because I never heard of Alfys Pizza if was Well known Pizza Place I will give it a 10Www@QuestionHome@Com

8 - I like the style!
Just an opinion, but the second verse threw me off track, it may work better down as second from last verse after "pizza dairy queen etc", get the reader more into "band" stuff earlier on, rather than general food stuff which could be "Roadworker" or "Secretary" or whatever!.
And spelling dude!
You could put song names in italics, lose the *!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

As it is now, I would rate is a 4!.5!. To improve it, you could make the following changes in my opinion:

1!. 1st stanza: "playing out of tune," instead of "turn!."
2!. 2nd stanza: "F" in "Fruit" lower case to keep with the rest of your poem!.
3!. 3rd stanza: change spelling of "baratones," to the proper spelling!.
4!. 4th stanza: change spelling of "instrament," to the proper spelling!.
5!. 5th stanza: I'm not sure what is going on here!. First, capitalize the "i" in the first line to keep things consistent in your poem!. I don't have the slightest idea what you are trying to do with the "word," "dis ires," nor why you are putting astericks in this stanza!. So, changing or not changing this is up to you!.

Actually, changing any part of it is up to you!. These are just my opinions!.

I like the idea presented in the poem, I just think it could flow better!. If you made the changes I suggested, I would rate it a
7!.5!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Punster that I am, I would have loved to say "BAND" should be banned!. But you've got something good here!. It needs some work!. First of all, your spelling is a shipwreck - use a spell check!. [It won't tell you that "bussed" means 'kissed,' try bused!.] I'm not sure what the *'s mean!. Usually it's something whose explanation is at the bottom of the page!. I think the last line should be "I AM BAND!." What do you think!?

So here are my ratings: Spelling-2; Grammar-4; Punctuation-4; Imagery 9!.5; Inventiveness-8; Rhythm-10;Meter-7!.5; Humor-10!.

So keep at it - practice, practice, practice!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

2!.4!.!.!.!.too weird and boring for me but then again i love the dark poetry and depressing side of it so, yeah!.!.!.way toooo boring!.!.!.if it were something dark and mysterious then i might go a bit higher!.!.!.sorry!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

6 I give you points for being unusual, but the poem has no flow and is cofusing to a certain degree!. Still 6 out of 10 is above average!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Its cute,Funny & sharp
luv it mmm!.!.!.I'd rate it about!.!.!.8/10
But I really do like it!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

To me it's like a five!. cute!. check your spelling, though, misspelled words distract from what you're trying to convey!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

5!. Right in the middle!. Sounds very High school!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

-100Www@QuestionHome@Com

4, it's sort of!.!.!.!.strange!.!.!.yet not without a sense of depthWww@QuestionHome@Com

All in all I would give it a 4!.
sorry:)Www@QuestionHome@Com