Very short: Do you like these lines?

Question: Very short: Do you like these lines!?

As I reach out to kiss you,my beloved red rose
I watch you wilt in the claws of these thorns
An agony spreads all over my body
Numbing my senses to these slashes
And even to the dripping blood from my eyesWww@QuestionHome@Com

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

Very talented!.!.!.now put it to music and you might have a hit record! keep it up!!!Www@QuestionHome@Com

Nice use of symbolism!.
Nice free verse!. I am more of a old form
fan that feels that there should be a combination of
rhyme with tempo!. There are many worthy styles and you have your own
For instance I would say;
"Numbing my sense to pain of these slashes
while scarlet red blood drips from my lash's"Www@QuestionHome@Com

Hello!.!.!.!.Hello!.!.!.!.!.follow me!.!.!.!.!.okWww@QuestionHome@Com

Its dark, different!. and really makes you think!. its good cause it could mean alot of things!. I like it!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

You had me until the last line I'd revise it but the beginning is excellent!.!.!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

It is very goodWww@QuestionHome@Com

yeah i like thisWww@QuestionHome@Com