Will you critique my poem: The Secret Writer?

Question: Will you critique my poem: The Secret Writer!?

Nightime falls,
the curtain closes,
the act no longer needed!.

Four walls can't judge,
now she is free,
ink bleeds into the paper!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:

I like your poem just the way it is!. I understood it completely! You are free to be yourself with your ink and paper at the end of the day, and gladly too, because of the repetition of your life during the day!. Oh, where that ink and paper can take us! If only others knew!

I especially liked Nighttime falls!. Drew me in write away!. (I spelled write wrong on purpose---I know, pretty lame!)

Thank you for you lovely poem!Www@QuestionHome@Com

EXCELLENT SHORT POEM, but try rhyming next time!.

for example :

Night time falls,
The curtain close ; (not closes, cos' the rhyme is perfect like this)
The act no longer needed!.

Four walls can't judge,
Now that she's in her hut ; (see that!!)
Ink bleeds into the paper!.

(the syllable is the hardest part but you have miles to go before you sleep, so, you'll learn day by day!. write more and practice more!.)

Keep it up & GOOD LUCK!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

I love how it is describing the girls ability to finally be herself!. I have a poem that I wrote that is very similar to this!.!.I called it mask!. I do like this poem a lot!.!.!.!.!.I look forward to reading moreWww@QuestionHome@Com

Amateurish, yet probably personal to you!.

Don't give up, keep writing, try and pick different subjects than your personal plight!. There's plenty of time for that later in life!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

'ink bleeds' is extremely cliche!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

is she writing a diary!.!.!.Www@QuestionHome@Com

I love these little short punches!. Very cool!. TDWww@QuestionHome@Com

i dont get it can you explain it sounds intrestingWww@QuestionHome@Com

it is very niceWww@QuestionHome@Com