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Question: This one is strange but i like it!?
ENTOMBED
tick tock tick tock
runnin' outa time
saw my insignificance
flash before my eyes
pop went the cap
gripped the clip in hot hand
reelin' thru the "groovy, dude"
got stuck in sucking quicksand
hot lava baby
melted in the frying pan
lost my shoes by the tongues
eschews to pick a fit man
sober hovers nowhere cold
or even in a vacuum
clock has struck
but sluts still strut
until they hear that click! boom!
down the hall a waterfall
came crashing down on baby
drowning out the screams
of merciful mother mary gone crazy
makin' money on one and twenty
hit me with a shockwave
met me in a mausoleum
while i danced on my own grave
wind blows it's own horns
it matters none the least
the dream is dust
but in god we trust
one day we will all
rest in peaceWww@QuestionHome@Com
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
It's wonderful!. The imagery is superb!!
Be careful to ask questions about your poetry when you post ok (this isn't a question, you're making a statement really that this piece is strange but you like it and putting a question mark at the end)!. You write so beautifull, I'd hate to see your things removed and the administration will do it if you aren't asking real questions!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
I like the feel and sound of the words but I am not sure of the meanings of some of the lines or phases!. But keep writing for we all need to see the world through others eyes!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
where did you get the imagination for that!? did anything inspire that or was it just spontaneous!? I like it!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
that woud be a cool screamo/rock songWww@QuestionHome@Com
niiice!Www@QuestionHome@Com
nice I like it !. Did you come up with that because it's nice!
Woah!Www@QuestionHome@Com
I like the rhyme scheme!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
lovely my dear! just lovely!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
A person ABOVE advised you well!.!.!.remember to clearly ask a question, Not make a question in the form of a statement with a question mark at the end!. I believe that the Yahoo folk in power will have the presence of mind to allow this incredible piece of poetry to remain!. I am trusting that their perception of the greatly valuable should remain!. But next time, as a gracious compromise between Yahoo and you, ask a question, For example : "This one may be a bit strange, but please tell me - what do you think of it!? - (I myself like it!.)"
Now, lovechilde is all this incredible poetry of yours patented!? Have you taken steps to protect what is yours, what you have taken caution in protecting what you are allowing go into a very large forum!? There are some people who may pilfer what is worthy and call it, make it their own, if you have not made it officially your own ALREADY!. I've tried cautioning you about this from the beginning!. It is important that a poet of excellence as you are protects what is given light from her spirit, mind and viscera!. No one else should be given an opportunity to unscrupulously steal!.
Again, I perceive that 2 beings in you are writing this:
The one who has suffered incredible, unbearable to most, from what I know of you, young woman, BUT NOT YOU!. BECAUSE YOU ARE STRONGER BY THE GRACE OF ART and THAT WITHIN YOUR PERSON WHO IS THE SCRIVENER!
The other being, the abused and trampled and savaged and brutalized because of a dastardly, unfortunate past is being given by the scrivener, the poetic Muse, deserving attention,
care and refuge!.
It is good that something So Full of Grace, has recognized you and kept you afloat, all this time, and through all you have gone through!.
Were I you, I'd keep ahold of the Life Saver The Muse has thrown you dear, into that quick sand!. You must keep writing, writing, writing, you must feel, understand, accept the opportunity to write as a purge!. Let all that backed-up pain be regurgitated!. It must ALL come out!. Even at times when it feels you are spewing a muddy cascade full of rocks which at times frighten you to hold back or you'll choke!. You will not choke!.!.!.I promise you!!! I have been where you are!. Art saved me to!. I have hanged (on) to it since I was 4! I have never let it go! It has never abandoned me!.!.!.it is my truest friend and partner!.
I know NOW, that without it, I by now would be in a mental institution, or a suicide!. But The Muse of Art saved me!
It is OBVIOUS, not apparent that your poetry shows brilliance!. It is the WHOLE, WHOLESOME, HEALTHY being in you!
Make a covenant with it!. It has already made its' part of the covenant with you!.
Complete the Union!
I notice at first glance that something you know, but IT IS NOT Exposed or Revealed, for whatever your, or its' reason is invisible between every other line!. I'll not be the one to analyze or project what that is!. You are the POET!!!
I remember the first poem you entried to forum!. It was alike a peek through a door, a little child might hold a little bit ah jar - to ask, "May I!?"
Now look at what your pouring fourth!.
It is no longer that shy, tremulously apprehensive little girl afraid of savagery, afraid of rejection, if she is noticed and for some reason, not her fault AT ALL, needs, wants, MUST be heard nevertheless!. You are pulling yourself by both Grace of your strength and the Muse's out of the quicksand!. Do not Let go of such a Saving Life Saver and the Hand which holds it, as you are extricated : NEVER!!!
"hot lava baby
melted in the frying pan''
God that hurts - it hurts even me, what the image creates in my mind!
Your friend sincerely,
Grecia!.
P!.S!. You are NOT Entombed!
Perhaps at an earlier time you may have thought so!.!.!.that was then, dear MAGICAL, Graced,<(favoured) - Lovechilde, THIS IS NOW!!! - DON'T YOU FORGET IT!Www@QuestionHome@Com