Position:Home>Poetry> (I'm 13) wrote this poem.. a new one..what do you think?
Question: (I'm 13) wrote this poem!.!. a new one!.!.what do you think!?
your like the killer, and i'm your victom!. You take me and break me!. you take my heart and break it in your hands!. Your words get into my mind and make me so inscure!.Every tear that falls is like a droop of blood!. It makes me weaker and cuts me deeper!. I die inside!.you've taken all my pride!. I see myself as nothing!. Because, of what you've done!.In this war you're the killer, and you've won!. And you've killed every little piece of me on the way!. Because of you i will never be the same!. But, even if i dont die all the way, my pride is gone, my hope has crashed and, my self esteem is at its lowest!. You've killed my soul!. But, since your the killer i dont think you've noticed!.Www@QuestionHome@Com
Best Answer - Chosen by Asker:
really fresh,
its kinda like what i write (ish)
i write about exaggerated scenes of brutality and murder and use these themes to explore my own subconscious!.!.!.its really theraputic,dont you think!?!?!?Www@QuestionHome@Com
yeah it OK i guess but dont tell how old u are that's really bad pple now a days r not safe to tell how old u r !? OK they could come and get u ewwwwwwww!!!!lol u r not very goo that i can tell right maybe ur others will get better!? have fun with ur toys ( short stories that make no sense)Www@QuestionHome@Com
Yes, I love that poem, I'm trying to come up with a Mother's Day poem!Www@QuestionHome@Com
nice!.!.!.
=]Www@QuestionHome@Com
Yeah, that's good, just put it into paragraphs, and change the "your", to "you're", and you're done =]Www@QuestionHome@Com
For being 13 it is not bad!. this is not a poem though, not even free verse!. More like a stream of thoughts strung together!.
I will show you;
You the killer,
I'm your victim!.
take my heart
and you break it!.
Words worm in my
mind so young!.
Every tear that
falls, insecure!.
Tears fall down
like drops of blood!.
Makes me weaker,
cuts me deeper!.
I've died inside,
you've stole my pride!.
You took my life,
left me nothing!.
In this war,
you the killer!.
Because of you,
I'm not the same!.
My pride is gone,
hope is crushed!.
Self esteem,
non existent!.
Even though
you've killed my soul!.
I don't think
you;ve even noticed!.
This can still be trimmed but I jsut wanted to give you an idea of what I was talking about!. Keep writing!.Www@QuestionHome@Com